Fiance01

My fiancé and I went clubbing with a couple friends last Saturday night. I got really drunk and I don’t remember everything that happened. According to my fiancé I played him out almost all night and I also starting dancing with some guy in front of him. I knew the guy, we went to school together and we were dancing, talking and catching up with our lives. I do remember dancing with him and I know exactly who he was and I did NOT dance with him in a provocative way. My fiancé got upset and he tried to get my attention and apparently I didn’t see him. So my fiancé went to ask my best friend if I knew the guy and she told him I did. When my best friend saw he was upset, she started dancing with my fiancé in a provocative way (grinding with each other). I remembered this the following day so I confronted my fiancé because it was bothering me. He told me that yes they danced like grinding with each other but he didn’t get as close as when we danced. I think, I did wrong by not introducing my fiancé to the guy but I don’t think I disrespected him. In the other hand I think my fiancé and best friend disrespect me because I really didn’t appreciate the way they were dancing. My best friend just became single, and she always tells me I have a good guy as my fiancé and that he is the better good looking out all his friends. Should worry about my best friend? Should I confront her too? I am embarrassed to do it since she can tell me she didn’t mean this way. What can I do? Help!!!

Kallygirlie

I honestly wouldn't worry to much about it. You are engaged for a reason right? I think he did what he felt you were doing to him. why should you be upset at him dancing when you were dancing with someone else. Granted you may not have been grinding but now days, it seems thats the normal club dancing. I tell my friends all the time how great there man is and yes I even said it when I was single. doesn't mean I wanted them. Now if she makes comments about how cute he is then thats a bit different. My best friend and I went out to a bar and me and her man danced together. wasn't a big deal.

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Krystal

Hopeless Dork

Oh I'd worry about her, alright. She's already made it clear to you she finds him attractive. She's shown you know that she will take advantage of the situation if he is upset with you. She could have comforted him and told him not to worry about that guy if she was your BEST FRIEND... not took him out and grinded on him.

Chris rock said it best in one of his acts...something to the effect of when a man see's one of his friends with an awesome girlfriend they will say 'wow, she is so cool... i gotta get me a girl LIKE her'. when a woman see's one of her friends with an awesome boyfriend they will say 'wow, he's so cool... I gotta get HIM.'

I hate to say it ladies, but some of the female species are quite shady, and all's fair in love & war to many of them. I'd not cut her off entirely... but I sure wouldn't put them in a position to be alone often.

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Defintion of Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results." - Albert Einstein

GlitterAndStuds

Oh my god! I was JUST thinking of that exact quote, hahaha. And it's crazy how true it is. Women these days are so competitive, and it doesn't seem to matter who they're competing with. Actually, it seems to be worse when it's between friends. For some reason, girls just want to make everyone jealous of them and go to some crazy extremes to do it. This is why I only have a select handful of female friends, I never see this kind of drama with the guys I'm friends with.

It would be one thing if your friend sat with your fiance to keep him company, or was like "Don't worry about it. Let's grab a beer at the bar and wait for her" or something to that effect. It's even one thing to just dance with him a little so that he'll feel better. But to be full on grinding is a complete other thing. It's basically dry humping on a dance floor. You have every reason to feel uncomfortable. Obviously your fiance was just doing it to give you a taste of your own medicine type thing, but she sounds shady to me. The dancing combined with the comments she's made is even making alarms go off for me.

I do agree with Kally that I'll let my friends know when they have a good guy. I like to give my approval if they want it. But I won't go on about how hot they are or anything like that, single or not. If it will make you feel better to confront her, then do it, but don't come at her like a bat out of h&ll or anything. If it sounds like you're accusing her of something, it will just put her on the defensive and it won't do any good.

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Fiance01

Thank you guys for your comments. It has help me a lot. I wanted to make sure that I was not being too jeulose of her before I confront her about this situation. I honestly think that there were other things she should have done that night. If i was in her place i would have approch my friend and let her know that her boyfriend was not happy with the situation. I confronted my fiance and the fact that he told me it was her the one who approched him dancing that way, it makes feel better, and he only danced with her that way because he was really mad at me. I also told him, he did bad too because he should have pull me aside and let me know he was not happy. The previous comments she had made about him and then this situation. I know I have to be more careful with her for now on.
I agree with GlitterAndStuds now in days, there is so much jeulosy and competitive between friends.

Miya

I also agree with HD and G&S. Be wary of this "best friend" as she really could have just reassured him that it was all ok instead of taking advantage of the situation.

It probably would have been much better though if you had introduced your fiance to this guy before dancing with him and not responding when he was trying to get your attention. If the situation was reversed you'd probably have felt the same way or worse. He shouldn't have had to ask her in the first place.

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Do not dwell in the past,
do not dream of the future,
concentrate the mind on the present moment.

-Lord Buddha