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Reply With QuoteWe do one to one when we have big problems with our close friends.
Anymore and we revert to type most of the time. Anyone you know less than 5 years and forget it.
Men are not good at analysing subtitle sub text.
That is a good point. For many women, it is second nature to talk to their friends about their problems, experiences, fears, etc. However, I don't see a group of guys hanging out drinking a beer, talking about the things women do.Originally Posted by Futureboy
But the funny thing is, if one of them started, the others are probably secretly grateful because they are having/had the same problem but, no way, would say anything.
Friendship Prayer
May the fleas of a thousand camels infest the crotch of the person who screws up your day and may their arms be too short to scratch.
Amen
Whoever said anything was possible obviously never tried slamming a revolving door.
We do one to one when we have big problems with our close friends.
Anymore and we revert to type most of the time. Anyone you know less than 5 years and forget it.
Men are not good at analysing subtitle sub text.
Yep, you can pretty much forget about it in a group setting. Just look at most online forums where most of the members are men. The only thing they'll ever be willing to talk about and agree on when the subject turns to women is that they're 'money grubbing, soul sucking b*tches'. If someone comes along and tries to get more analytical or even fight that stereotype they're typically dismissed as either never having had a girlfriend or being a fruitcake.
No
But I don't fit the expected roles in the expected way.
I'm not a tomboy but I own and use quite a few tools and do construction related work. I also do needlepoint and embroidery.
I'm perfectly capable of (and have) lived in a tent, but love a clean, comfortable home.
If I have to I can squeeze a penny until it's see through. I can spend over $200 on a cut and color and consider it a good deal - and then virtually ignore my hair so long as it's clean.
I love being naked and love sex but would never consider public or overtly sexual displays, nor would I be likely to do something like pole dancing - publicly or privately.
I will never marry again, have no interest in "catching" a man, but I do want a deep and committed relationship. (that has to be a mutual desire to be together and keep it fresh)
I can probably creatively out cuss most men, but I don't like crudity.
Real blood doesn't bother me, but I won't watch violence or gore & guts in the media.
I love sex, I can have it darned near anytime without any foreplay or preparation, I can and have (not always) orgasm just from being entered, But I love to spend hours playing and arousing.
I don't know what men are looking for. But in many cases it doesn't seem to be anything that any earthly woman can fullfill. Virginal Ho? Solver of all problems who helplessly melts into their arms? On the shelf while they jack off to porn, run with the boys, insult her and then seductive when he is in the mood? Is it really any wonder that women who have been trained from birth to accomdate and propipiate, have a hard time with what they want? From a man or life?
An assumption on this thread, you're a "maternal figure", supposed to toe the line and fit whose image of what? Excuse me. I'm a Goddess woman. I've birthed babies, nursed them, buried my mother and many other people, I've gotten down in the mud and dressed in an evening gown in the same day. I've loved, raged, laughed. sobbed, mended what was broken, smashed things. I've handled rape, being beaten, stalked, verbally abused and then had men call me "honey" and suggest I'm too weak to handle life.
I stated what was on my mind at the time. What I wanted in a man. That was a "disapointment". This is very typical of what women, myself in particular, face regularly.
What do I want from a man? To be loved, passion, respect and most of all to be able to be who I am.
We can only learn to love by loving. - Iris Mudoch, British writer
Oh There You Are,OTYA
You are a maternal figure here, and to fully discredit men because of your
bad experiences or choices with that gender is doing a disservice to the woman who love you, follow you and listen to you.
There is so much time here spent slapping stereotypes onto men and women alike. As a result, we reduce this forum to a place to vent, express hate, distaste and frustration, and further remove it from a place promoting self improvement.
Wildchild made a statement pertaining to her life, and quite frankly she has a right to speak as a woman as well as a Moderator... That is how she feels, and that is what she wrote in accordance to the question of this thread, her choice.
No one has the right to judge her position here as a Moderator or any other Moderator and stop her/them from being herself... Other than the people above her,or the people above them, please don't advise on how we should speak on this Forum as Moderators. As that is not the case... we are encourged to remain ourselves on this site.
It is indeed a Forum, where people can vent, we promote it, it's useful for people to get things off their chest, we also encourage and motivate them, to the next level of their lives and try to provide encouraging words as well as opinions that may help them. If anger comes out so be it, it's healthy...
There are also alot of positive threads such as Weight loss including encouragement.
I suggest you read every section of this site.
I noted you came on and posted one post, which is full of put downs of a poster / Moderator and the Forum in general.
If you don't like this Forum, no one is making you stay...
There is debating, an issue, and there is putting people down for what they believe in, I believe you crossed that line...
I personally respect your views, but you need to respect other's views as well..
CW
Last edited by CHANDLERS WISH; 12-08-2009 at 02:25 AM. Reason: added
Do we not realise that in order to find a soul
It doesn't happen over night
if truth were to be told.
Like everything in life that's hard to achieve
you must believe!
I so agree with this statement
I actually tried my hardest to tell my ex, that NOT ALL WOMEN are "money grubbing, soul sucking b*tches' as you put it, but he refused to listen even after 7 years and I left him with the lot?
That doesn't make me stereotype does it... a fool maybeBut, I made that commitment at the beginning to prove my point and I don't go back on my word.
Do we not realise that in order to find a soul
It doesn't happen over night
if truth were to be told.
Like everything in life that's hard to achieve
you must believe!
Rueful Smile. I deal with this too and keep hoping he will come out of it. My recent ex had a problem with it too. A lot of us over 40 or 50s seem to find this in men in our age group. They got hurt - in some cases in their 20s and they aren't letting go of it. Maybe they get better later?
We can only learn to love by loving. - Iris Mudoch, British writer
I personally think "once" it's set in their mind it can't be changed, a woman can change a man, a man can change a woman but the other party needs to let their guard down and be content with themselves and slowly let go of any of this "baggage" they hold.
If they can't see in front of them ,they won't see where they are standing at that moment and will only see, where they stood.
Do we not realise that in order to find a soul
It doesn't happen over night
if truth were to be told.
Like everything in life that's hard to achieve
you must believe!
Exactly.
All you can do is say, hey I'm here, you know me and they have to figure it out. I get the, women are x,y,z, except you, you're different..."
We can only learn to love by loving. - Iris Mudoch, British writer
My simple mind asking a simple question, expecting a simple answer coming from the heart, come from learned, experienced women like you.
No man, no, not one can question you or any member in this forum, for speaking your mind, for sharing your thoughts and feelings on any matter under the sun. That's the reason why I stayed here. I felt the freedom to be myself and be accepted for who I am.
The reason why asked about this was that while equality between genders is widely advocated to infinity, I seem to observe the way genders are "naturally" wired.
Our past world was very paternalistic in every way, hence, I am curious if that fact is still present in our subconscious, hence, some women would prefer their men to take the lead, while some prefer 50-50, and the remaining others prefer to be leaders that their men follow.
Does our genetic make-up and on-birth default set-up, where the male baby is helpless and dependent on their mothers affect any of there built - in "defenses" against and/or for women?
What counts in making a happy marriage is not so much how compatible you are but how you deal with incompatibility. - Leo Tolstoy
The clearest explanation for failure of any marriage is that two people are incompatible; that is, one is male and the other female. - Anna Quindlen
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