Thread: hubby cheated emtionally with ex .

hi , well after 18 years together ,i found out on august 28th that my husband had been ib contact with his ex- girlfriend ( that have not been together for 20 years .) we we having problems in our marriage m and he was having work stress and didnt want to talk to me baout things. so he went to her in mid july and thru august to talk about our marriage and about me. I found out thru trusting my intuittion , adn looking in his work phone book and finding her email and phone number . became an dectective and put her cell phone in reverse cell phone directory and out pops her name. Well the nite i found out , my husband was at bingo tell 10 pm. i found out at 8pm , and emailed her and asked if she had been emaling my husband . Long story short she has been looking for him for 17 years . and she says htey are just friends. well on teh night of august 28th ,i confronted him , and he ilied and said that emtionally cheateing is not cheating, bull pucky i said. Well, long story short he said that he was ready to leave me , but decided against it. i ws pissed and wanted to cheat on him , but told him it was morally wrong ,i wanted to make his heart break , just like he did to mine. i cannot trust him, and we are working things out by going to marriage therapy , . Last night he told me that he regreted contacting her , but that it was good to hear from her after 17 years . what i said . opps then he realized what he said . We are learning to communicate better , and not to say things in haste , but i am having a hard time putting this behind me. he has not had contact with her since august . i strongly believe that a man cannot be friends with an ex- girlfriend , especially (spelling .) one who he has had sexual relations with when he is married ? am i wrong ? things are better , but it is going to take mea long time to trust him , and to get over what he did. anyone have similiar experiences or advice . thanks in advance s . walker