Thread: texting issues.... I am worried about us.

Daer friends, I am a stay at home mom of three amazing beautiful children. I have been married to their father now for 12 years. I thought we had an open, great marriage, aside from the regular ups and downs, until a year ago. He started secretly texting an old married girlfriend that was having relationship problems. He was hiding them from me, putting her pics on his phone, and would never let me see or use his phone, unless all was deleted. At first so mad!!! I Confronted him and To make matters worse I felt horrible as I was 7 months pregnant. We talked into the wee mornings, and thought after a few months all was well...... Last night I found his phone by accident when he lost it and another"Old Friend" and him have beetn texting secretly. They are using secret names, just in case. I confronted him, again. He has turned away from me for the past two months sexually and communicating not at all. I want to know what is going on, I ask him often to tell me, to talk to me , I am his wife, but he seems to be talking to her just fine. But not me.. I am so tired of the Just being a friend excuse, I want to scream.... help. I will not live a life of lies!!!!

I'm sorry to hear this. Do you have any idea what might be driving him to act like this? I'm not saying that this sort of thing is excused, but if you understand the cause you might be better able to figure out how to make it stop. Having children around the house can absorb all of your time and energy - is there a chance that his time at home and with you has started to feel like a chore and by contacting ex girlfriends he is trying to relive an earlier less busy time in his life? (just a thought - it might be something completely different).