my husband cheated but i cannot get over

**rbrampton** · 08-10-2010 05:15 PM

i found my husbands behaviour a bit differenent and as i dug deep i found he had been talking on the phone secretly to a girl he met at the gym .there was no physical contact but they had cofee once which also i found out. Everything i found out is from the things i found myself but my husbasnd never disclosed anything on his own. my husband admitted his fault but 1 week later i found he was still talking to her . i rang the girl and she told me that she never knew he was married with 2 kids. My husband got a pay as you go phone which i had no idea to talk to the girl . i came to know of this when the phone company called home for a promotion. it was a big shock to me.when i asked my husband ,he said he just wanted to cool the girl up as she was very mad at thim for lying and everything is over now.Should i trust my husband as he is being nice to me and said that it is OVERnow.my husband is 42 years of age and we have been a very happy couple.
my heart is so full of pain and i need advise as i have no one to share this episode with. i cannot get over the fact that he was cheating on me like this. how can i be sure if he has stopped or he is still talking to the girl? do you think i should call the girl ? please advise as i am very lonely and depressed.......... and also humilated as i have been very sincere and devoted to my husband. i have never had a boy friend or any relationship . i was 17 when i met my husband and i really love him do you think he is out of love with me?? what should i do?

**sourpuss** · 08-10-2010 06:05 PM

I think the two of you should go to a couples counselor. If he's serious about wanting to make things right, he'll go with you.

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 08-10-2010 06:48 PM

What he did was calculated. He went and obtained a phone, so that he could call this woman. He also perhaps lied to this woman if she is telling the truth that she wasn't aware that he was married, nor had children.

I would tell your Husband that he was calculated with his approach on this, planned... and that he's lost your trust.. I would agree with Sourpuss, if he "thought" he could get away with something, and didn't and wants to win your love, then he needs to go to councelling to establish why he strayed to start with and mend what he has done...

CW

**hizenberg** · 08-10-2010 10:33 PM

ring the girl get some answers, then get answers off him again, dont think you cant as you have evryright too and if shes decent and you can talk to her calmly she will do the right thing hopefully and be honest, also get therpy qith your husband as he will do it if he id seriuos about about you 2 working it out, dont give up yet you guys have a lot of history to just throw away. good luck hunnie i hope it all works itself out for you both