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Thread: What am I going to do. When is it never my fault.

  1. #1
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    Default What am I going to do. When is it never my fault.

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    What am I going to do. When is it never my fault. I am tired of always having things that go wrong my fault. I have a energetic three year old daughter, that loves to take off running at the very chance she can get. One day I was outside, getting the mail and I had my purse in one hand and I am juggling the mail in the other. When I finally got a good grip on the mail, my daughter took off right in the parking lot, where the cars speed through. Luckily, my fiance saw her as he pulled up. I explained to him what happened and that I tried to get her before she took off, but he did not believe me and told me that I was a bad parent. He later, tried to put me out of apartment to show me how upset he was and how frustrated he was, because I did not continue to talk to him about the situation. I just about had to beg to come back into the apartment and pretend that everything was okay. I am so frustrated because there is nothing I cannot seem to get right by him. What am I going to do?

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    WH Super Moderator Array sourpuss's Avatar
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    How is it his place to tell you how to raise your child? Erg. Let him have her for a day or two with all the errands and responsibilities and see how easy it is.
    I'm assuming that every disagreement goes this way. Locking you out is ridiculous, you're not a dog, WTH. Do you think that he is controlling/abusive in this regard?
    How long have you been together? Have the two of you seen a counselor where you can both talk freely without being blamed or attacked?
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  3. #3
    WH MODERATOR Array Beautiful Disaster's Avatar
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    Agree with Sourpuss. This is ridiculous and unacceptable behaviour on his part. I can't tell you how many times I've had to slow down because a struggling mother with her arms full lost grip of her little ones hand and he/she took off waddling towards the road. You're not a bad mother for that, you're just human.

    Are there other instances in which he feels you are a bad parent? What are some other examples?

    Why are you degrading yourself by begging him and pretending like everything is okay just to make amends? Come on girl, stand up for yourself, you're better than that. Little Bit needs to see that Mom is a strong independent woman that will take up for herself and hold her head high. She needs that so that she can learn by example and be a strong independent happy woman herself.

    "Be what you're looking for."

    "The next time you're thinking of kicking someone when they're down, offer them your hand and help them back up instead."



  4. #4
    TEAM ADMIN Array CHANDLERS WISH's Avatar
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    I'll take a different take.

    I assume your Fiance is the Father? And, if not, step father to be who loves your child...

    Your home from the sounds of it isn't a safe one, if your situated right by a parking lot with speeding cars...

    He doesn't have the right to treat you the way he did, but I think it's fear as to why he is upset, fear of her getting run over.

    It's so easy to make a small management decision that may go wrong, with no intentions and that part he needs to pull his head in and understand.

    What he should have done was talk together over it, on how you can get around this in the future, such as, they have and I'm not sure what they call them, but a strap that goes around a child, with a lead, that gives you control so they can't run off... When you have to exit the house for a short distance and can't carry a child plus a purse, plus mail...

    Find a solution, not dis the partner,.... perhaps tell him that....

    CW
    Do we not realise that in order to find a soul
    It doesn't happen over night
    if truth were to be told.

    Like everything in life that's hard to achieve
    you must believe!

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