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Thread: Husband's saying I love you to someone else?

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    Silver Contributor 100+ Posts Array auntie_awesome's Avatar
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    Default Husband's saying I love you to someone else?

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    How do you all feel about your husband saying "I love you" or "love you" or "love ya" to other women who are not related to him in any way? Do you mind, not mind? Would you let them do it?

    I think that those phrases should be reserved for those they are actually related to.

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    WH Head Moderator Array WildChild's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by auntie_awesome View Post
    How do you all feel about your husband saying "I love you" or "love you" or "love ya" to other women who are not related to him in any way? Do you mind, not mind? Would you let them do it?

    I think that those phrases should be reserved for those they are actually related to.
    Depends on many factors. Tone of voice, circumstances, what the relationship is. If they are like family it might be a normal thing for them to say.
    We can only learn to love by loving. - Iris Mudoch, British writer

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    Moa
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    I would have killed him if he said anything like this to a woman who is neither family nor an old close friend, no matter what voice or circumstances
    “Vision is the art of seeing what is invisible to others.”

    Jonathan Swift

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    Silver Contributor 100+ Posts Array auntie_awesome's Avatar
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    That's what I was thinking Moa, I asked him not to say it to other females he is not related to. I know there can be different circumstances for the words, but I always thought they shouldn't be said frivolously. I said he could say "that's what I love about you"...as in he loves a character trait about a person....but he doesn't get how I feel.

    Hopefully I'll get more opinions.

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    hmm I guess it would depend who he was saying it to. If it was a friend of ours, I probably wouldn't like it, and if it was a coworker of his, I would like it even less. If it was his mom's friend who he has known since he was little, then I would be okay with that. I guess it just depends how he knew her.

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    Silver Contributor 100+ Posts Array auntie_awesome's Avatar
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    Well in this case he has known her for a year only on the internet. While I'm not concerned of a physical relationship occurring, it still seems frustrating. I could see if it was someone who is his elder and he grew up with, things like that still seem more like family to me.

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    If it is an internet only relationship, how did you find out?

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    Silver Contributor 100+ Posts Array auntie_awesome's Avatar
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    Facebook walls are easily seen by others. We are both friends with this woman.

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    Ok. Is there any other communication? Are they inboxing eachother on FB? Can you access his account? A lot on FB can be seen, depending on settings. There are certainly things on FB that can be hidden as well. Before I decided whether or not this was a big deal, I would want to know a little more. This is certainly a red flag. But I do not know if you have enough info to decide what exactly is going on here. You may need to do some digging. I would, logic being if he is saying that on her wall, what might he be saying in her inbox? Perhaps nothing at all. But it bears pursuing, in my opinion.

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    Yeah I definitely wouldn't like that. Especially if he has never met her before. It is rather odd... But if your husband is always just a really affectionate person then its really hard to say. I would ask him about it because you really do never know what is going on in their inboxes.

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