How Would you feel?

**JuliaBarill** · 12-13-2010 08:03 PM

OKay so my bf now...ex fiance has a past of cheating on me. so ive been sleeping all day..mind you i had a miscrarage two days ago.....and he grabs the computor and is on it all day. so when i wake i check my facebook.....his relationship status was changed from "married" to engaged....now we werent ever married b4 for but hes never seemd to have a problem with it...then he s chANGED his profile picture from us togetther to..him alone..then i find out that he was talking to some chicks from gowanda.....so the way im takibg this ......some asked him if he was single or mairred blah blah....but he dosent want people to know hes off the market.......hes hurt me..pretty bad this time and..im (edit) furious...what should i say to him...how should i adress the matter i havint told him what i thought....

**Hopeless Dork** · 12-13-2010 08:33 PM

He didn't say he was single, he still says engaged. And since you guys weren't married ever, it makes sense that he would not have married as his status... especially if he has friends and family on his page that would be confused by that. If he changed it to single from in a relationship or from engaged to single... I could see being hurt by it -- but it could be possible that he just wanted to change up his page a little and make it more relfective of his real life situation, attached but not married... and the pic change could be just bad timing.

**JuliaBarill** · 12-14-2010 12:30 AM

yeh it makes a lotta sense i guess ty

**hoops** · 12-14-2010 02:38 PM

Originally Posted by JuliaBarill

..mind you i had a miscrarage two days ago.....

Seems to me that if you were pregnant, the committment is pretty serious. If it bothers you that much, you should ask him and tell him how you are feeling. Surely, you are going through a lot emotionally right now. Better to talk it out rather than let it bug you?

**JuliaBarill** · 12-14-2010 02:49 PM

yeah i honestly was pregnant.....thing is he dosent like to talk things out. Expecially if hes in the wrong and he knows it. this is why im so stuck

**Moa** · 12-14-2010 11:16 PM

You know, if he doesn't like to talk things over it's his problem. You can't sit quietly in the corner and be hurt while he doesn't want to discuss problems just because he feels uncomfortable!! I don't know the details of your relationship but considering you have been through such a terrible thing as an unfortunate pregnancy he must be doing everything possible to make you feel better! And he is just chatting to chicks and enjoying himself on fb?? I understand you were furious! I'm not sure about him changing the status and his profile pic (though I hate it when my husband changes the picture of us to him alone but never mind), all this might have been harmless. BUT. I think you should let him know your feelings and he must understand that such things are not appreciated especially when you both had such a bad thing happen to you...............

**JuliaBarill** · 12-15-2010 02:08 AM

i agree. ontop of everything ................my last name is his on my fb . untill last nighht when he told me in so many words to take it down. So my retaliation latley has been talking 2 other guys to make him jeolus......hes seems pretty pissed over it,

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 12-15-2010 02:16 AM

Don't play games... You get hurt? You deal with it, you discuss it, you don't retaliate and certainly you don't try the jealous game, because it will bite you in the bum, he will not trust you and your relationship will be gone....

You have to ask why he is your boyfriend and not, fiancee.

Already I can see a communication breakdown, your heck bent on making him jealous and he is retaliating, or reacting the way you "want" but it's not going to solve anything....

Having said that, your using your defence. Your wanting him to say hey babe, sorry..

I am sorry for your miscarriage... You need to establish what they mean't to him... He went from wife to fiancee to single almost... Why? What is he thinking?

You retaliate with flirting with two guys, what would he be thinking?

You say your hurt because he cheated.... in his past.... Sweetheart, two wrongs don't make a right even if you say you didn't only your playing with him, that's enough for him to have doubts, your heading only for this not to work...

Communicate.

CW