Thread: ?

**pretzel** · 03-24-2011 07:46 AM

Well, I know personally, all you would have to do is put a bib around my neck and lead me to the buffet line. There's nothing more erotic and enticing.

Sometimes, maybe, you just need to take the bull by the horns. Next time he wants you to perform oral on him, start out like you usually do and after you've started then put yourself in a position where it's pretty much just staring him in the face.

It may very well ruin the moment but it'll force the issue and you'll be able to address it right then and there. You're married, I doubt that one night when sex is interupted because of something that needs to be addressed because it's important to you would have serious long term effects.

**Beautiful Disaster** · 03-24-2011 08:03 AM

Well, I know personally, all you would have to do is put a bib around my neck and lead me to the buffet line.

LOL!!! I love it.

Just like some women don't like going down on their partner, some men don't like doing it to their partner either. Doesn't make it "right", but it certainly doesn't mean anything is wrong with you. Obviously you want to pay particular attention to your hygiene...going above and beyond in that area is not a bad thing.

Next time you're doing it for him, perhaps swing around, put it in his face and see if he goes for it. (I just read pretzels full post and see that he already said this. hehe. Great minds think alike!!!) If he doesn't, I'd be inclined to think he's being very selfish and I would certainly not continue doing it for him. If he doesn't like oral, then he needs to accept not receiving it either.

**caster** · 03-24-2011 08:57 AM

If he doesn't, I'd be inclined to think he's being very selfish and I would certainly not continue doing it for him. If he doesn't like oral, then he needs to accept not receiving it either.

Why would you say that? If she enjoys doing it to him why should she stop? To punish him for not doing something he doesn't like doing?

Gatitia: If you haven't already, you should have him trim your pubic area for you, let him see you up close and personal and that it doesn't bite. Let him pleasure you like that with his hands a few times. And if after a few times he still does not want to give you oral then accept the fact it's not something he's comfortable doing, and no one should be forced into doing something they don't care to do.

**Beautiful Disaster** · 03-24-2011 09:04 AM

Why would you say that? If she enjoys doing it to him why should she stop? To punish him for not doing something he doesn't like doing?

Simply because he's not telling his wife "Look honey, I love you and everything about you, but this is one thing I just really for whatever reason can't stomach doing". That would be bad enough. He's giving her, what seems like a very bogus response of "um I'm scared because I had this friend one time that went down a girl one time and got an STD.". I have serious doubts that something of that nature would keep him from orally pleasing his wife, as it doesn't seem to be stopping her from pleasing him. He needs to either be honest with his wife, or stop expecting treatment that he's not himself willing to give. It's both a lame and insulting excuse to tell your wife you don't want to go down on her because you're scared of std's.

Just my opinion, and the OP will read it as such just as she will everyone elses.

**pretzel** · 03-24-2011 09:11 AM

true, there's no indication from the OP that she doesn't enjoy doing it. There's also no indication that she's only doing it because it's something that he likes. What if she's doing it solely for him and his pleasure even though she finds it disgusting?

I've done many things over the course of my lifetime that I didn't like to do but I've done them because it's something that either made my ex happy when we were together or that my wife enjoys. That's the whole thing, I do it because it makes them happy and feel good about themselves and their pleasure. I just happen to think it's pretty much a no brainer.

**Beautiful Disaster** · 03-24-2011 09:27 AM

What bugs me I guess is the fact that he's never done this for her, even though she has brought it up clearly expressing interest AND concern about it. It's not as if he's tried and just couldn't do it. I have had bad experiences giving before... and maybe it was entirely unpleasant with one guy, but great with another. I ENJOY doing it when I know I am really pleasing my partner.....not because it's just super fun and wonderful for me and that's just how I like to spend my time. It is a time in which I forego my own physical pleasure to focus solely on my partners pleasure. And most certainly I think there's a high element of selfishness in someone who will kick back and receive and receive and receive, yet refuse to even TRY to allow their partner to experience similar pleasure.

**kristalyn_04** · 03-24-2011 11:40 AM

I agree with you BD, it's very unfair.

Gatitia, if this issue doesn't resolve, or you at least don't get a reasonable and understandable explanation from him, then it will continue to be a problem and will eventually grow into resentment. I actually broke an engagement because he was very lazy and selfish, especially in the bedroom and I just couldn't handle always giving and giving but hardly ever getting reciprocation. Nip this in the bud now before it becomes a bigger problem.

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