selfish husband

**Tonya Holmes** · 04-13-2011 10:57 AM

I married a selfish man,who was not this way when we first meet. Everything has changed after we married. We have a house he makes way much money than I do and wants me to pay him 500 a month I'm struggling to get hours and go to school full time. I relocated to be with him took a step down from my job sold all my stuff and he's all for him self. He's now in the process getting him another car but, if I ask him for money its like pulling teeth. But he is quick to run to the bank for everyone else. There was a time when he would call me 4 and five times a day I'm lucky if I get a call now! What should I think? I've started to ignore him now I have his calls going straight to voice mail when he does call I started going out to the movies,dinner and spa just to stay away I'm nice when I'm in he's presents which I make myself scares really quick. Is this the right thing to do? I just want him to have a lil of himself back so he can see how it feel.

**KMonte85** · 04-13-2011 11:14 AM

I think there are more productive ways to get the message that you're unhappy across. Being passive-agressive has never solved a marriage issue EVER, as far as I am aware. Clear, level-headed communication and a bit of empathy from both spouses does.

Have you talked to your husband about how his behavior makes you feel? I mean really TALK - sit down just the two of you, no distractions, no high emotions, and communicate your feelings. Does he know that the way he handles money issues with you hurts your feelings and frustrates you?

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 04-13-2011 03:22 PM

Tonya, curious can you give a little more insight as to how it was before you got married, and how long you have been married for, what you are studying and if he supports this study....

CW

**jns** · 04-13-2011 08:22 PM

Originally Posted by Tonya Holmes

I married a selfish man,who was not this way when we first meet. Everything has changed after we married. We have a house he makes way much money than I do and wants me to pay him 500 a month I'm struggling to get hours and go to school full time. I relocated to be with him took a step down from my job sold all my stuff and he's all for him self. He's now in the process getting him another car but, if I ask him for money its like pulling teeth. But he is quick to run to the bank for everyone else. There was a time when he would call me 4 and five times a day I'm lucky if I get a call now! What should I think? I've started to ignore him now I have his calls going straight to voice mail when he does call I started going out to the movies,dinner and spa just to stay away I'm nice when I'm in he's presents which I make myself scares really quick. Is this the right thing to do? I just want him to have a lil of himself back so he can see how it feel.

This relationship is in trouble. Talk with him and maybe go to counseling.