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Thread: Lie after lie.. Should I confront him?

  1. #11
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    I actually don't agree with you on that one.

    I think there are guys who have grown up in very religious households who repress that desire. And if that is what makes them happy, that's great for them. But I do feel that its very rare for a guy not to have at least the desire to masturbate. I really do feel that the reason guys don't do it, is based hugely on their religion, not based on how they feel.

    I admit, I came from that same train of thought growing up. I grew up going to church, and thinking sex was wrong, masturbation was wrong, and I was simply terrified of it. Now that I am an adult, I don't think that is true. I still do believe sex should be saved for someone you love. But to sit back and condemn a child for masturbating (and children do do it) can ruin their sex drive when they grow up.

    I would say its FAR more likely (at least in Canada) to find a guy that does masturbate and think about sex fairly regularly as opposed to a guy who doesn't do it at all. Actually it somewhat shocks me, that a guy would never masturbate once in his life. Its a fairly common thing for boys (and girls) to do when they are young. They touch themselves, it feels good... so they do it again. Its part of our human nature. Teenage boys also have wet dreams, and that's a completely subconscious release. Again, if someone feels that its not right and surpresses that desire, that is completely their choice -- I just feel that most people (guys and girls alike) choose to just go with what feels good. And I would say the majority of girls and guys have the desire to think about sex/masturbation.

  2. #12
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    I had an ex who didn't masturbate, because he thought it was gross and "homosexual" to touch himself. He had some homophobic issues, so that could be it. I think I masturbated more than the person I just broke up with.

  3. #13
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    I am saying, I think its more unusual for a guy not to masturbate, than to do it. Its of course not 100% accurate. But at least where I come from, even in religious circles, I don't know a single soul who doesn't masturbate (girls and guys included). Some do way more than others, and I think its simply that they have a higher sex drive than others.

  4. #14
    Junior Member Array MeghanCouture's Avatar
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    I have known many men who masterbate and many men who wont do it.
    my ex boyfriend before I met my husband, he masterbated several times a day.
    When I met my husband we weren't able to have sex for a while, He masterbated one night in the shower and told me it just felt completly wrong. To this day he wont do it, We just have sex.
    There is nothing unusal about a man not masterbating at all, Everyone has there own thoughts but that is one thing I would be a little weird about my husband masterbating in the shower when he has a wife rite here.
    Him too, he see's no point in masterbating when he already has someone.

  5. #15
    Junior Member Array MeghanCouture's Avatar
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    We couldn't have sex for a certain reason, I never told him that he couldn't masterbate that was his own choice that he made himself. When it came to that I never told him what he could and could not do, he is his own person and could do whatever he wanted at the time.
    (edit)
    Last edited by CHANDLERS WISH; 11-09-2011 at 12:38 AM. Reason: rude comment

  6. #16
    TEAM ADMIN Array CHANDLERS WISH's Avatar
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    Meghan, you made it clear that your husband didn't like it, he felt he was cheating and was prepared to wait until you could have sex.

    We do not judge on this Forum and we do not attack a member either..Everyone has a right to express their own feelings, thoughts, beliefs in their own relationship and their own knowledge of told experiences? Hense the deletions of posts here.

    I have no doubt the OP will not even reply after all of that.

    Mature people will discuss masterbation how they feel about it, if it effects a person or not and how to compromise if required, when in a relationship.

    Yes, there are women who aren't sexual enough for their partner and so, they masterbate.

    Yes, there are men who do not "want" to masterbate as they are in a safe, good relationship and have all that they need, and yes there are some men that need that little extra relief and so, masterbate and then there are relationships that masterbate only with each other.

    Back to the OP's thread please...

    Lies to me are not tolerated, however, if it's a white lie? One whereby they have fear, really not doing anything wrong, "it's their body" but don't know how to discuss it? Then it's called communicating with each other....

    Further replies, please refer to the OP's discussion in this thread...
    Do we not realise that in order to find a soul
    It doesn't happen over night
    if truth were to be told.

    Like everything in life that's hard to achieve
    you must believe!

  7. #17
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    Completely agreed with above.

    To me, its the lying that is the HUGE red flag, not the masturbating or even porn watching.

    But I do apologize if I was rude or mean. I do think it is a little odd that a guy would never masturbate -- but everyone is different. If they choose not to do it, its their own choice, and good on them for that. But it goes the same for guys who do choose to do it (but they should be open and honest with their partners).

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