Paying for a wedding

**lizzardb63** · 11-20-2011 03:35 PM

Hello,

So my fiance and I are getting married on Oct 20, 2012. Our plans on how to pay for the wedding were pretty well set. My parents were giving $4,000 and his parents were givig $5,000 and the rest should have been paid for through money we'd get from the wedding guests. If we seriously had to get more money, him and his brother own a landscaping business and he would have refianced his skid steer and used it as collateral for a small loan.

Long story short- his dad's business shed burnt down that had him and his brothers skid steer and more of their business equipment in it. So now- 1. His parents aren't going to help us anymore, and 2. The skid steer is totaled and we no longer can refinance it.

What do I do? I am thinking of speaking with my bank and asking them for a personal loan and use my car for collateral if they need it. I do have other debt so I was also considering consolidating that too, just to make things easier. Any advice of what the best way to do this is?

It's not realistic to say "Just save money"...but times are tight. We can pay our bills and have some money for fun, but we cannot save $9,000+ in 11 months. PLEASE ANY ADVICE WILL HELP!

I don't want this time to be a sad and frustrating time. I seem to only cry over it from the stress.

**caterpillar79** · 11-20-2011 04:01 PM

How big of a wedding are you planning to have? Can you redefine your plans so that you won't need that much money?

**lizzardb63** · 11-20-2011 04:46 PM

Well, we will probably invite anywhere between 300-350 people (which estimated only 275 will probably show). We already reserved the hall and put money down for it, we put money down for our dj to reserve them, as well as bought my dress and our rings. I was in the process of working with a florist when this came out and wanted to lock in a photographer...but now I am just so stressed. I need to sit down and figure out exactly what everything will cost in the end, but what do you think is the best route to take?

**Little** · 11-20-2011 04:53 PM

I don't know if this is "done," but could you ask any guests who may have the skills you need (photography, for example) to "gift" you their skills for your special day?

**lizzardb63** · 11-20-2011 05:10 PM

Well I was going to ask my cousin if she can make my cake, because she does wedding cakes, but I need to ask the reception hall if they require that the baker be licensed. Usually if they require it and I have someone who isnt licensed I have to serve the cake (which in most cases the bridesmaids do anyway)...otherwise, I am going to be making my own decorations for the church, some of my bridesmaids are into scrap booking, so they might be able to help with invites and bulletins (or whatever they are called). Any other ideas?

**caterpillar79** · 11-20-2011 07:13 PM

The wedding favors, I know you can assign to some girls/bridesmaids if they are willing. I used to help my cousins with theirs when I was younger. They would buy raw materials cheap and I'd just copy a template they made. Glue gun, scissors and all - that may be included with your wedding invitations and program.

Of course food will be catered, and here's where I'm going - have you chosen a caterer? If not, shop around and have them do some bidding.

**lizzardb63** · 11-20-2011 07:20 PM

The reception hall that we booked provides the meal already, so that's already included in our expenses.

**caterpillar79** · 11-20-2011 07:27 PM

That's good then.

If you don't mind, maybe we can have a list of your full budget itemized so we all can put our heads together. I'm trying to crunch the numbers but couldn't realistically because I don't know most of the details - that is, only if you don't mind.

I only spent less than $500 in my wedding and my Mum (the Beautiful White Witch from Australia), sent the money I spent for flowers. I know everybody's different. My hubby and I were more particular into keeping it small in order to save and just splurge on the honeymoon trip and still have money left for my immigration documentation at that time.

**BabyGirl** · 11-20-2011 07:47 PM

I am sure you want the Perfect wedding Hun, But these days and with hard times and the economy ( that may not get any better by next Oct ) hoping that you won't be or hubby get layed off , or even Downsized .

$9000 is alot for a wedding , especially if others ( parents ) cannot help, Any way you can maybe marry in a more private Ceremony , then have an Awesome Reception ?

**rosekitten** · 11-20-2011 08:27 PM

I understand the desire some people have to have the elegant and beautiful wedding. But, I have to ask since you mentioned taking out a personal loan- do you want to have to pay for your wedding well into your marriage? I've known people who have financed part/all of their wedding, and they've regretted the fact that their special day is something they're still paying for. BabyGirl brings up a good point about having a smaller ceremony with a large reception afterward.

You already have the hall booked, the dj, and the meal taken care of. For your dress, what about finding it on sale or at an outlet store? You can google ideas for home made wedding decorations, and they usually have ideas for floral arrangements. Your bridesmaids can help with a lot of this. I've never heard of having to have a licensed baker for the cake, maybe it's just something normal to your area? I could understand if you were charging for it, but it seems odd to me.