Thread: Think my wife is cheating...please help me decide

Originally Posted by looking

She did give me valid reason for suspicion 15 years ago - before we got married. She left home one day with a certain hair style - went to school and when she got back home later that day, her hair style was in a pony tail which I found to be a little odd. On top of that, she never gave me a chance to touch her or have conversation - she immediately went into the bedroom and and then into the bath tub. All that was odd to me because we would usually greet and talk for a while before she settled in.

Call me insecure but, I decided to check her underwear. They were not where I would expect them to be (on top of the laundry) but, they were on the bottom of the laundry bag.

I confronted her, we fought and I left her. We eventually got back together but, I guess I never forgot about that and some other things that she lied about many years ago.

Guess I have to learn how to trust again - it's not easy.

Well in light of this I don't blame you at all, I would also be suspicious myself. I guess I would have to say just keep your eyes/ears open, as I said IF something is going on it will eventually surface.

I sure hope all your suspicion is for nothing.

Originally Posted by looking

She doesnt have a yeast infection. the swelling and tenderness was gone the next morning. If it had still been there, my suspicions would not have been aroused.

Is it normal for the swelling and tenderness to come and go? This happened a week ago and she is on her period right now. Fallen1 did say that it could happen around that time of month but tell me, would it come and go like that or be constant?

If the tenderness were constant for while, i could understand. I have been trying to convice myself to believe that maybe it's just a coincidence that she was out late that night and the swelling and tenderness was there because of some female reason (other than a yeast infection - would not come and go if so) that normally occurs.


No, I do not tell her how much I love her enough. I am going to start doing that more. In the mean time, I need to know if she is cheating.

She may be cheating and she may not. One late night and swollen vagina is not enough to be absolutely sure she is cheating. You should give her the benefit of the doubt.
I also agree that you can't come home and just expect her to turn on love like that. We do like to feel loved and appreciated. The more the loved the more we are interested. If a women has a yeast infection it's highly unlikely she will feel immediately back to normal i.e next day. Usually tenderness is about a few days before the cycle and may hurt during intercourse. If she is unhappy with the relationship, you won't have to guess. It will come out on it's on. In the meantime, just focus on making things better.