Thread: need help please!!

hi 24,
i understand how you feel. my first hubby cheated on me with a very young girl, much younger than i was at the time. now i'm older 38 to be exact and now i'm in a wonderful relationship and have learned some things over the years. what i have come to realize that men are just wired in that way. they are very visual beings. my husband is very true to me and has never cheated on me in any way but he does enjoy looking at other women so be it by porn, on the computer, tv, magazines, or out in the world. he will even comment on how beautiful he thinks a woman is or just comment on a certain part of her body. it used to get to me because it did make me feel like i wasn't good enough and i know my body isn't perfect i have had 3 babies. but i did get over it because i know deep down in my heart he loves me and my body. he is with me everyday and night. i'm the one he comes home to now for 7 years. i used to play along, like say oh she is cute don't you think? it would catch him off guard when i did that. i never let him know that i was jealous in anyway. just follow your heart, if you know he would never betray you then who cares if he looks. it's inocent. men are just that way. well maybe not all of them but the most i have met are. you should hold your head up high and just remind yourself he picked you to marry and have a child with, no one else!!!! be proud of yourself. when you are confident with yourself it will show to him and everyone else. especially your husband. i hope this helps a little.......

I understand how you feel. It is not easy going through child birth and feeling your best. I know i have been through it twice and its hard. Its a very vulnerable stage.
I think that if you feel like that your looking at her and feeling he likes what he see's, it may too be just in your eyes, and hes just looking. But I do agree that he loves you and wants you, married to you and comes home to you.
I think woman can look at woman and think she is goodlooking. And worry her man thinks the same thing.
Woman tend to look other women up and down like its a competition, and men look at each other like the other men are intruding on there territory, like "shes mine", but that is natural to feel that way. Its human nature.
Your a young couple, in love, with a new family, thats beautiful. Trust in it. Looking is natural. Love is something else entirely.

I am 32, I have a 2 boys, the youngest is 5. I still have those feelings you talked about.... I dont like to be insecure but sometimes you just feel that way. My boyfriend is 27, and he acts quite immature sometimes, and I think hes looking constantly at younger women..... I am in school, I am going back to college actually, and I am looking forward to getting back to feeling more myself..... more self esteme.