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Thread: Should I stay, or should I go?

  1. #1
    Junior Member merlot71 is on a distinguished road
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    Question Should I stay, or should I go?

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    I am a mother of a beautiful 10 year old boy. I have been with his father for 18 years. We finally got married in 2007. 10 months later his sister plants some grusome photos of him and other girls from several affairs hes had over the years. His sister has always done that for as long as I can remember she just doesnt want us together, I think she is jealous of us, dont know. These photos were disturbing!! Now, I know he has cheated on me in the past in 1999, we split up when our son was 2 years old. I forgave him in 99 for that cheating epidose. After I took him back he continued to cheat without my knowledge through 2001. So now I dont know what to do. He says he hasnt cheated since 2001 and has been faithful and dedicated to our family for the last 7 years. But this one is a doozie the pics are very disturbing beyond comprehension. I told him he was sick and needed help. I think he is addicted to sex with other woman.
    See, he likes to take pictures and video of himself in the act with these girls and one of them was a hyped up hooker. Needless to say he did bring home an STD! Which I just found out! And it could cause cervical cancer in woman over the age of 30!!
    Our son doesnt understand and it hurts me to see him cry about us splitting up for good. I have way too much time invested in this relationship and I am stuck. Please give me some advice what do I do???
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  2. #2
    Banned from WH whilhelm is on a distinguished road
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    what's his disposition? does he want to save your marriage? would he see a counselor?

    what makes you think he's a sex addict?
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  3. #3
    March 2008 "Poster of the Month" rcoreyus is on a distinguished road
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    Were any of the photos from after you were married? For many people there is a big difference between "cheating" and "adultery".
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  4. #4
    Silver Contributor 100+ Posts LadyLane is on a distinguished road
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    I'm even wondering if the sister-in-law is jealous.... or trying to show you the man he really is.

    The fact that he lied for two more years after you found out and took him back would be the noose around his neck for me. And the fact that he was careless and thoughtless enough to give you an STD.

    What proof do you have that he has been faithful from 2001 until now? And what brought that turnaround in him, if that were the case? Because if he was just having meaningless sex and it wasn't an affair where he was in love and contemplating life with another woman, I can't think why he would stop... in other words, what "lightbulb" went off in his head that made him stop. Can you think of those years, back in '02? Did you become closer? Did he become a better father? Etc.

    You say you have too much time invested in a bad relationship. But if you had a lot of money invested in stocks that kept going down, you'd take out the rest of your money before you had none left, wouldn't you? Time invested in something that's bad for you is time wasted. The good outcome was your beautiful son.
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