Thread: Um... Hi

Originally Posted by Isra

Thanks for welcoming me.
Now I will elaborate and answer a few things.
Yes, I do consider myself transgendered about 90% of the time the other 10% is when I'm in full on completely doubting everything mode. >_< I went with the phrase gender developing because that is exactly what I am doing. Transgendered encompasses the more "classic"/"stereotypical" individuals who are, "A woman in a man's body." but it is not a one size fits all glove. There are also the individuals who aren't defined by binary gender, androgynous people who identify not as male and not as female either. And people who just plain don't know....

My current situation is that I have a male body and have had the set of roles and expectations that come with it. But I don't know if I want to keep it that way. The idea of fulfilling the typical male roles is something I have a general lack of interest in. Exchanging male role and expression for more feminine ones is something I have a growing interest/curiosity in. But in terms of identity I'm still working to figure it out at the moment if the "choices" are male, female, and other I fluctuate between female and other, only rarely moving back to male (usually when I am in the aforementioned completely doubting everything mode).

In terms of my physicality I'm not sure either. I don't detest my body rather I think discomfort comes from the fact that people see me and default to male when identifying and interacting with me. A way to correct that would be undergoing hormone replacement therapy but I have no disillusions regarding that. Hormone replacement therapy is not the "magic girl pills" it sometimes gets paraded as but rather a life long medical regime and the current understanding of its long term implications is lacking even among medical professionals.

Its a quandary I've finally begun to ponder now that I have finished grad school, moved out on my own, and started my career. It really isn't too different from anyone else who is finally confronted head on with really figuring out who they want to be when they grow up, or rather who they are when they've become an adult. Only real difference is the answer and the path I may end up taking. I wouldn't say it is frustrating because frustration is merely one aspect of what it actually is, difficult. It is at the same time the most difficult and interesting thing. I am learning a lot about myself and regardless of everything I can pride myself in that I am looking within myself, confronting things and developing/maturing as a person.

Welcome.

You talk about your inner struggles, but you have not talked about your experiences or how you present yourself to the world.

Have you been in relationships and if so, what were the particulars and how did they end? Do you express your curiosity of being feminine by dressing the part and if so, in public?