CAP gives flight lessons ... slap a brochure down on that woman's desk.
I was in competitive shooting for a few years in high school (never did any competitions; just learned how to do it.) The first thing we learned was to RESPECT the gun and realize it does damage; that it's not a toy.
Kids these days, indeed. I almost want to congratulate parents in stores who tell their children to stop misbehaving. Almost all of my friends are STILL living off their parents at age 20-23; their parents give them whatever they want. I think that's the main problem. Certainly parents should provide, but children need to be taught the value of the dollar ... if they can't respect an object, how can they be expected to respect a human being?
Flying is a great hobby for teaching responsibility, though very expensive. Sailing is also good - and not nearly so expensive. For somewhat younger kids, model airplanes, boats, rockets, etc can teach the value of spending time on a project, and sometimes show how much it hurts to loose something you have worked hard on.
Who knows what the answer is regarding juvenile delinquency... i think it's a combination of attention-seeking, rebellion, anger, jealousy, ignorance and boredom caused by bad parenting in one way or another. they have to be trained from day 1.
Far too much in my head to articulate here but for example boys dont always have the positive male role models in their lives to look up to and learn from and the same goes for girls and positive female role models- they all need love, respect, rules and boundaries and will follow by example - it's not really rocket science is it? a child who's constantly being smacked may grow up thinking it's ok to hit people; if a child is given no discipline they may think they can do what they like with no consequences. the balance has to be right and that will vary from child to child.
I'm always amazed at the behaviour of some children...a friend of mine has a 3 and 5 year old who scream and shout at her until they get what they want. And they do get what they want. Oh my gosh that would never happen in my world! My son knows a tantrum is not the way to get what he wants. Others have kids from ages 5 to 10 who swear and have tantrums at the first sign of not getting their own way. The real problem is that the mums dont make it clear that it's unacceptable behaviour! and these are 'good' parents in other ways.
I NEVER smack my son and would only do so if it was the only way to prevent a seriously dangerous incident, but i'm firm and fair and he's a good boy who shows respect for other people and property - ok he's 5, almost 6 but i'm hoping he stays that way because i've been consistent about behaviour, i talk to him respectfully and explain everything i can about good and bad behaviour... he knows that you should treat people as you would like to be treated. he's still a normal boy (but lovely haha) but he's not disrespectful like others his age, maybe it's alot to do with attention- my son gets alot of positive attention from me so doesn't need to be bad in order to get any..?
you can't always blame the parents of course but i see my friends' kids acting like little brats and i can't understand why they allow it- it can only get worse! i have to stop myself getting involved! god forbid the time may come when my son starts rebelling in order to impress his friends...i'm hoping that he'll understand that it's not necessary to 'impress' real friends by being bad.
Does anyone have any good/bad comments about kids joining scouts/brownies/sea cadets etc??
I appreciate your comment maz, and I believe all of them to be true. Altho I was one to physically correct my children when needed, I understood that there's a limit to this stuff and you have to be very careful. My wife and I raised 5 children 4 of which are boys, and I am truly thankful they have turned out to be good kids.Originally Posted by maz33
Your quote above made me think of a time when I talked to 1 of my boys about his 4yr. Son.
They were at the house 1 day and the boy was saying no to his mother and father thruout the visit and done very little to correct it. I said to myself this is not the way I raised my boy to allow this kind of action without some kind of disciplineI always endeavor to stay out of my children s business but I had to talk to my son about this one.
I called him at home one day and brought up the event and begin to remind him if he continued to let his son do this that one day he was going to be smacking his mother and trying to run the roost ( I seen terrible examples of this when I was growing up boys hitting their mothers because they were allowed to be rebellious)
When I got done he said thanks Dad, I appreciate the comments on that and we'll work on it and I believe he has. He just got Weary and a little Careless.
I say all that to say this - I remember talking to the wife about about how weary we were about always having to correct our children in some form or fashion and our main conclusion was we can't quit, we have to go on on if we want our children to be respectable citizens of our communities. I'm glad we did.
One other thot, I realize also sometimes you can do all you can do to raise a child in a very good way & sometimes they just turn out to be that 1 bad apple, When we grow up we make the choices of who we want to be & how we want to conduct our lives regardless of how we were raised.
Maz, given the right research the of local clubs, scouts, and so on I think these things are good for kids, problem is in our society today ther's is so my strange people out there I'd want to have full assurance they my children are in good care. Good tho't Maz
Well Im gonna put my $1.50 in this one. I've used several forms of discipline with mine includeing warming that azz up on several ocasions..never when I was mad always waited untill I had calmed down...plus waiting and wondering when its gonna happen is half the punishment...I may get flamed for this part but here it goes...alot of children arent taught respect nowdays..youve got babies raising babies,grandparents raising grandkids....you have a pill for everything....shrinks telling you its not your fault your like you are...we have excuses for everything No one stands up when they screw up and say's oops my fault.... we Pass the buck....Heck youv got most cartoons nowdays makeing parents out to be Stoopider(wouldnt let me post it) and kids to be smarter and know more.... I do know some people do need medication (MY Opinion) Many dont... lets not deal with lil johnny's problem or try to help him through it. Let just drug him up make him almost comatose then he wont get in trouble.Its ok if when we ask him a question he gets this faraway look and it takes him 10 seconds to answer.(I have a brother like that sometimes but its self induced)
Personaly I think we need to quit makeing excuse for our mistakes... we all make them usually its not anything that cant be fixed with a little thought and elbow grease.
Well Im done with my rant.......it may not make sense to anybody but me.
If it wasn't for the bad times.... We wouldn't appreciate the good ones!
OOps miffed Think ya deserve a pat on the back for what you did!
or on the front if ya want.
If it wasn't for the bad times.... We wouldn't appreciate the good ones!
Very well said Lak, I would lay my life down on it, if the world, would take that admonition you just gave it would be a sweeter place to Live and we'd have less crime rate, FACT!
Sorry but it stirs something inside me, see what you started mif
thanks!
Lake I agree and am no angel myself (hard to believe, I know). Forgive me Father for I have sinned. I have recently been very naughty and have no-one to blame but myself. I am an adult and take responsibility for my own actions. I have now mended my ways and have got my halo back
BUT
Parenthood is more like rocket science than you might think actually- as much as we're all different and develop our own personality traits etc no matter what our parents try to do, a parent has to think about every aspect of their childs' life and upbringing so that they as far as possible only allow them access to the positive either situation/ reaction/ outcome etc. WE are responsible for our CHILDREN'S actions the majority of the time.
Some people think bullying, teasing, upsetting other children is normal childhood behaviour and it may very well be harmless for half the class but the other half will probably carry on bullying others way into adulthood, or will continue to be bullied and intimidated by others. It's not acceptable in my eyes. There is a worry that we either molly-coddle our children or allow them to witness and be influenced by/ subjected to all manner of ferel, anti-social behaviour through tv, video games, family, friends, internet etc. We need to know who and what is influencing our children.
My husband has a habit of quietly and non-directly bringing your attention to "fatties" (his word), and although he sees this as harmless fun I tell him off in front of my son because I dont want him to grow up thinking it's ok to ridicule someone who's a bit fatter than he is because that's where bullying starts. We have to think about the behaviour we show our children!
My mum never disciplined my brother, not when he stole from me or others or beat me up, or shouted at and behaved aggressively to me and her, kicked my bedroom door in etc. My dad on the other hand would hit or kick him if he did the slightest thing wrong. How was my brother supposed to know what was right or wrong? He spent the rest of his life doing what he wanted with no regard for others and no fear of punishment- prison didnt stop him getting his own way and he showed absolutely no respect for women until he was about 30 and bringing up his own family. He knows now that what happens in childhood determines what happens in the future.
We need to TALK to our kids firmly but respectfully, they need to know who's boss, need to respect rules because life is full of them.
In-Need, thanks for telling us about your son- it can get tiring constantly reprimanding your kids and sometimes it's easier to just ignore certain behaviour but that doesn't help in the long run because kids need to know what the boundaries are and are much happier when they know the rules! Of course some behaviour should be ignored so yes it's very difficult to get the balance right.
I don't think smacking should be banned but I do think parenting classes should be a requirement for all parents so that they know when it's acceptable to administer a smack and/or learn other ways to discipline.
Out of a class of 30 my son is known for being one of the FEW really happy, intelligent, enthusiastic, loving, playful, respectful, understanding, calm, obedient, sensible (I could go on haha) little people in that class so I must be doing something right...
Sorry it was so long, I'm not very good at getting my point across concisely x
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