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Old 10-18-2009, 08:15 PM   #1
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Default Loosing my caring bone

I feel like i'm loosing my caring bone, you know that little voice inside of you that makes you want to help people. I just seem to have less and less emotions towards helping others. I used to love it, and just want to help as many people as possible. I don't know whats going on with me. Its not just with people online, its with my friends, my associates...there is a small select few left. I don't want to be this way, I don't want to allow this to happen. However how do i stop it? How do I turn this around? I feel like i'm going through a season or i'm being tested but I don't know what to do
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Old 10-18-2009, 08:36 PM   #2
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You may just need more time for you right now. That's ok so long as you don't become just disconnected from others. You should read (you know I have a book for everything, LOL) The Heroine's Journey, she talks about this. I really think every woman should read this book, the therapist who wrote it is really amazing!
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Old 10-18-2009, 08:38 PM   #3
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I think I will try and pick it up.
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Old 10-18-2009, 08:54 PM   #4
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Happens to me from time to time. I always find myself helping others and have been burned on several occasions. So from time to time I think I'm just gonna stop and that everybody can just go kiss my you know what. But I don't like being angry and I do think there are plenty of honest folks out there that need and deserve a helping hand. That usually snaps me out of it.

Be careful not to put too many people's needs ahead of your own. It's a balancing act. You don't want to disconnect from others but you also don't want to be there for everybody all the time.
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Old 10-18-2009, 09:23 PM   #5
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i agree with tex, you need to care for the carer - i have lost my tolerance for overly negative people, just cant be bothered with them. a bit difficult, when your mother is most negative person you know!!! ARGGGGHH!!
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Old 10-18-2009, 09:54 PM   #6
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I go through these spurts. I think it is normal. I'm a happy, good natured person, 95% of the time, but there are times it just feels like it gets old and I don't want to talk to people.

I agree with happy too. Try to stay around positive people, negative people are difficult to be around, they tend to drag you down with them.
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Old 10-18-2009, 10:13 PM   #7
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I've been there... It's tough. I've become a little calloused. The people who used to mean the world to me just don't anymore. I had a friend that I talked to every single night for hours and then one day I just didn't care anymore. Granted, something did happen. This typically happens to me when I've gone through something and as WC said, maybe it's just me needing more time for myself. I just have to remember that making other people happy, feel good and helping in turn makes me feel good and happy. It's always been a phase for me that I overcome eventually.
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Old 10-18-2009, 10:49 PM   #8
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I am honestly a more negative than positive person. It is bothersome to not enjoy being around people but at the same time I find people very boring. Things would be better if I could show even a bit of interest in what people have to say but honestly that does not happen often and I find myself faking the interest and giving people what they want to hear just so the conversation ends. However it does feel good when you can help someone out. For me that situation arises mostly at school when someone asks me to explain a topic or procedure to them. I do not wish to know them on a personal level, or even talk to them outside of that isolated moment but to still feel good about clearing up certain things for the person. And obviously they do not see me as a negative person because I am willing to help them if they ask.
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Old 10-18-2009, 10:51 PM   #9
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i think it can also get frustrating that some people are their own worst enemies ie they dont help themselves and expect others to step in - repeatedly!!! i will try and order the heroines journey, it sounds intriguing.

i think there are two types of people - radiators - who give out positive energy and drains - who suck up other peoples energy. if you spend too much time with drains, you naturally become tired and irritable.
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Old 10-18-2009, 10:53 PM   #10
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its a secret, its not negative to find it boring being around people. a lot of people need alone time. i am certainly one. a friend gave me a fridge magnet once it says "the more people i meet the more i love my dog" couldnt have said it better myself!!
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