Hopeless Dork

I think me being in tune with my feelings is a good thing. I am proficient at expressing my wants and needs, my likes and dislikes... I know what it takes to make me happy, and what works against that.

But sometimes I wonder... and with all due respect to this forum which is an immense help to me and so many... if many of us don't overthink, overanalyze EVERYTHING...

From symptoms of an illness, to pregnancy scares, to disecting relationships down to the floorboards.

I often catch myself empathising with a poster so much that I thrust their problems into my world and wonder if their issue is also mine.... I begin to question hmm... do I behave that way? Does my boyfriend? How would I feel if this or that happened.

While I think its nothing but good to get our feelings out, to talk about them, to get advice and to give , its what we are all here for...

But do you ever feel like you're becoming neurotic? Toooooo in touch with your feelings (if there is such a thing?) to the point of becoming a walking bag of issues?

I think I need to find the balance. Learn to know what to worry about and what to shrug over and let go.

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Defintion of Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results." - Albert Einstein

CHANDLERS WISH

This is an interesting thread, I've talked about this to many people here, Privately.

We do in-deed get attached to a certain "topic" and provide our "opinion" based on our own experiences.

Isn't that what "opinions are about?"...

Sure, with age comes wisdom and as such, we can also "read" the post/thread and reply based on that particular person's experience, un-biased and not with thoughts pertaining to our inner thoughts or experiences...

But, that can also occur when we answer something that has nothing to do with our lives, we just see the thread/post and feel something that makes sense to reply to.

I've already stated, "Porn" for-instance, or "Cheating" if that has happened, then the poster will reply to the OP based on their own experience and sometimes with hurt and anger to a degree.

Again, isn't that important? To share your own personal experience?

The one thing you have to seriously NOT do, is read what happens in someone else's life, relate it to yours and then "BELIEVE" that what they stated that happened to them WILL happen to you. That is definately NOT the case.

Each situation is different. So we need to not take it personally in that regard and assume....

CW

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OhThereYouAre

I'd say yes.

Most people, and judging from here, especially women, tend to overanalyze things.

People and situations just aren't as complicated as we make them out to be.

There comes a time when you think too much- and that in turn starts altering and affecting your life decisions and who you are.

If you make decisions based on what you know is right and what is smart, rather than based on what you think you feel, you'll probably find that you'll make a lot more progress.

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'If you think you can or you can't, you're probably right..."

"It is discouraging how many people are shocked by honesty and how few by deceit..."

"People who lack the sense to question Big Lies always end up in deep trouble..."

"I don't worry about pointing fingers in the past...i operate under the assumption that every saint has a past and every sinner has a future..."

"Build the life you want and then find someone to share it with, someone who fits where you are and where you are going..."

Miya

In my experience both here AND in RL, we do tend to overanalyze things (seemingly much more so than men or at least that's the case for us and relationships, maybe men overthink other things too)

It creates a wretched spiral in many circumstances. (ever heard of getting worked up in a tizzy?)

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do not dream of the future,
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WildChild

As a dear lady here has reminded me before, many of the people who post here are not happy people. Their problems are often the result of lack of education regarding their bodies, bc, sex,and general health, a lack of self awareness, hypochondria, there are a host of problems and issues. You can't judge the general population from people who post here or any where else.

Some people have serious issues, there has been more than once that I've been up pretty much all night emailing back and forth with someone who is sucidal. I'd guess that some of them have worn out or alienated the people around them, being online presents some different choices and the opportunity to talk with people who are not and will not be personally involved. You do hear about sites where people simply rip each other apart. It's hard to understand why the person being attacked doesn't just just say, "up yours", and quit logging on.

I used to go on a forum that was unmoderated although it was part of a good sized internet networking site, it was apparently taken over by a bunch of hillbillies who all lived in the same town or area and were essentially feuding. Literally the, "you and your fat so and so son beter wetch it nex time you drive that peice of junk by my trailer cuz I no ur the one that put Marys pig in my old outhouse. And we all no it was your husbant that got my cusin's dawghter pregnent and don't you dare show up at my job agin" It was insane. It apparently resulted in several law suits and eventually they shut down that part of the site. There were some nice people there but it became impossible to have any kind of rational discourse.

There were some actual mental patients (had to be) there too who would put up long rambling things, one woman would show up every couple of months with long posts about the children being murdered and buried in the school yard, saying there were 20,000 over the past 10 years and there were 40,000 people where she lived and why didn't any one notice that the sheriff was doing this? And where are her babies? It was sad. Believe it or not there were other people on the site who took it seriously and thought there was someplace with children being murdered wholesale. They would get all worked up.

We live in a world that is becoming more and more overcrowded, where it is increasingly easy for people to "slip through the cracks", we are exposed to all sorts of toxins that wreak havoc on our bodies and nervous systems, we are bombarded with merchandising and advertising - virtually nothing is exempt from the onslaught, it is no wonder that many people lack the ablitity to sort through it all. It get overwhelming. This site provides a different opportunity to interact. I enjoy that there are people from all over the world, different age groups, genders, and perspectives. And while there are a few I'd like to occasionally give a shake and (lovingly) scream, "What ARE you thinking??!" Overall this is a pretty good bunch!

I'm always examining, questioning, looking for meaning in it all. I am on a journey. It is headed in a specific direction. Awareness of it it started in childhood. There have been some seeming deviations but they gave me an education I wouldn't have had otherwise and new insights. Some of it's been painful but as I mature I can see that it will have been worth it. I can feel myself moving toward a point where it will all come together into a usable whole. There are people here who have helped me in clarifying some things (although they may not realise and would be surprised at what or how). I've done quite a bit of writing triggered by things here. Some I've shared and some I've reserved.

The important thing is, are you moving forward?

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We can only learn to love by loving.

Iris Mudoch, British writer