Spirituality and relationships
A question for all
How you your personal views of spirituality impact your dating/married life?
C'mon girls - let's have some FUN!
Am not dating right now but probably will be in the not too distant future. I am not religious but do have very strong spiritual beliefs which are increasingly important. My beliefs would make dating a jew/christian/muslim virtually impossible. I have made the mistake of trying to create a life accomodating someone of these radically different life views more than once and it was a miserable mess.
We can only learn to love by loving. - Iris Mudoch, British writer
I think people need compatible (but not necessarily identical) views of the universe in order to be happy together. (this drastically limits my options <g>)
I agree. I'm not religious, quite the opposite actually. But I will say that strong commitment to spirituality is one thing that really attracted me to my boyfriend.Originally Posted by rcoreyus
I was raised Catholic yet I have an open mind for other religions, and someone's own spiritual belief would not stop me from being attracted to them. I've dated Jewish guys before...and I've dated Hindus....never once did I have a problem with someone else's belief.
Religiously I will avoid men who are very into faith. I have complete respect for them practicing their faith as well as the faith itself, but my personal stance of atheism would only cause problems. So I just want to avoid any troubles for both of our sakes.How you your personal views of spirituality impact your dating/married life?
Spirituality though is non existent for me, I guess. I say I guess because I do like being close to my SO but I do not go into the whole "connecting of the souls" stuff. I do not believe such a thing exists so it is hard for me to stop the giggles when I hear things on tv or read stuff in books when they say "Oh I love you so much, I believe our souls have become intertwined into a tangle incapable of separation so we are now one instead of two people". In a way I do wish I saw things like that, because people genuinely do seem to be happier when they describe their relationship in that sense. But personally I cannot describe how I even feel about my SO (in a good way), I have no words to put to it so I guess that to me is leagues beyond some spiritual connection...although maybe that is how those connections are described. I do not know.
There are those who believe that dictionaries should not merely reflect the times but also protect English from the mindless assaults of the trendy.
Religion in and of itself is not a big deal breaker for as much as religious extremism. Karl Marx's "Religion is the opiate of the people" is where I tend to get a bit unnerved. I know enough fundamentalist Christians and over zealous adherants of religion to avoid that in any marriage/relationship.
Spirituality is, for me anyway, a compeletely different matter. I tend to view myself as a very spiritual person who does believe in God. But this belief should be something that is between you and whatever name you chose to call them, whether it be God, Buddah, Yarwah. It should be something that gives you an inner peace, not something that should be ritualized.
I have found I can't reconcile my beliefs with any group of function-attending religious people. Since I think of religion as such a private thing, I can't deal intimately with someone who thinks it should be a group activity. So that rules out all church/temple/mosque-goers ... as well as militant atheists. I can be friends with them, even very close friends, but not S/O.
I identify as NeoPagan, but I don't think I'd be able to have a relationship with anybody who wasn't a solitary practitioner. My boyfriend is something of an agnostic, but mostly keeps his religious ideas to himself. I think that's my ideal, but I would probably do well with another Pagan or someone who followed Hinduism. Maybe a Catholic, depending on their worldview.
But definitely not anybody who ridiculed or belittled my beliefs.
made one wish for a permanent kiss that would echo through these bones like arsenic
Women are female (adj,) but not females (n.) We aren't dogs.
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I'm an atheist, not spiritual or superstitious, and in the past I've dated people ranging from Hindus to Catholics, but nowadays I'm determined to stick to other atheists/agnostics. Sigh. The problem is that I've lost my "respect" for other religions. Too much Richard Dawkins, I guess. And that wouldn't be fair to a religious partner.
Atheism, environmentalism, vegetarianism and other non-traditional religions if taken seriously need to be considered in a relationship.
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