How do you deal with it?

**caterpillar79** · 02-03-2010 05:52 PM

Was there ever a time when you just feel 'blah' and could not explain why? Then suddenly your tears trickle and then more come out?

How do you deal with it?

1. When you initially feel it, what is the common state of health are you in?

a. Stressed
b. Just physically tired/illness
c. Not enough sleep/nutrition
d. all of the above

2. What activities/issues lead you to feel the way?

3. How do you change deal with it proactively?

4. How does your partner support you?

5. How does WH help you?

**WildChild** · 02-03-2010 06:24 PM

I almost always know why I'm down. One thing that happens to me is that I pick the energy from the space I'm in or people around me. Managing apartments, I'm very picky and do a lot of the work myself so I can end up spending quite a bit of time in an empty apt. I will pick up the energy that is in there and it can be difficult. There was one that a very dear man moved out of after about 4 years there - he actually became a freind and I drop by his home/business occasionally to chat. When I was doing some repair work in the unit he vacated I would find myself in tears, every time. He is a very quiet and reserved man whom I know was abused as a child. I think he holds a deep sorrow. Places where an intense emotional event has occurred are altered by it and can affect us. The emotions of people around us can affect us too. Ever met someone who just seems to lift everyone around them's spirit? Or someone that you feel tired every time you get around them? Negative people can drain us, while positive people will lift us up.

I am a great believer in purifying spaces by smudging or other means, if needed.

The things you listed can intensify the experience. Of course some life event are very draining. I'm struggling these days to keep my energy levels up. Losing a deep connection or even having it change can be devistating and it takes time to recover. I find being physically active helps, getting around people can help - although I need plenty of down time too. I do a lot of positive self talk.

I don't have a partner, nor do I have freinds who are in the immediate neighborhood, so sometimes I do miss just feeling connected with someone. WH reminds me that there are plenty of people with bigger problems than my own. Encouraging others, encourages me and you lot have often lifted me up and reminded me of all I have to be glad of.

**caterpillar79** · 02-03-2010 06:37 PM

Originally Posted by WildChild

One thing that happens to me is that I pick the energy from the space I'm in or people around me.

I have experienced this a lot of times. I am just not quite sure why and how I do it. Would you expound on this, WC. Is there just a select few who can do that, or is it built-in our human brain?

Originally Posted by WildChild

I am a great believer in purifying spaces by smudging or other means, if needed.

I also adhere to this. I resort to changing, rearranging things or even throwing old stuff away and really make a turn around to purge spaces. I once resorted to smudging, but since my opportunity to do that is limited compared to yours, I can have this effect in cleaning out spaces, cutting/clearing up plants.

Originally Posted by WildChild

WH reminds me that there are plenty of people with bigger problems than my own. Encouraging others, encourages me and you lot have often lifted me up and reminded me of all I have to be glad of.

WH is my talking/sounding board. In the absence of a human silhouette within my radius, I found sanity by talking to all of you. I get a lot of encouragement from you, CW and all the lovely people here. Realizing that I can help others with my experiences even if I am in yet another life's drama makes me feel and want to live life beautifully.

**stressed** · 02-03-2010 11:53 PM

1. When you initially feel it, what is the common state of health are you in?

Feeling like that makes me feel physically tired. If something good happens then the tiredness goes away. Sleep is important too, I need around 6-7 hours to feel 'up', which I hardly get.

2. What activities/issues lead you to feel the way?

Relationship problems, health issues that have to do with a relative, not feeling I've done enough for the day and I just waste my time, boredom.

3. How do you change deal with it proactively?

By trying to think positive and be confident that I'm going to make it anyway. By keeping myself busy with activities I enjoy. When I'm in this mood I usually clean the apartment just to feel I'm doing something useful that's physically demanding and will make me tired enough to get some good sleep.

4. How does your partner support you?

If it's not him causing it, he would ask me if something is wrong. If I say I'm just tired today and not feeling the best he'll leave me alone and some times say "you have the X and Y problem, I understand it, just don't take it out on me", which is not very supportive to hear.

5. How does WH help you?

It's helpful to read the comments of people who go through the same problems as yourself. Also, venting and reading advices can help one clear her thoughts.

**sperosi** · 02-04-2010 05:55 AM

OH yes, too often for me to admit without feeling pathetic!

1. When you initially feel it, what is the common state of health are you in?

a. Stressed

usually relationship related stress. i do well with work and family and general life challenges. close personal relationships and the associated ups and downs are my "demon".

2. What activities/issues lead you to feel the way?

usually disagreements, misunderstandings, not being able to say what i really think/feel. wishing things were different.

3. How do you change deal with it proactively?

i try taking with the other person, but for some reason i dont do a good job of communicating my true feelings. or maybe just pick people who cant understand me. or maybe i really am just insane.

4. How does your partner support you?

not.

5. How does WH help you?

gives me a place and people to vent to and get comfort from. i get to see that its not just me who has issues, and that other people can see where I am coming from, and that I am not the skewed person I have been told that I am.

**caterpillar79** · 02-04-2010 09:21 PM

I'm sorry to hear that, Sperosi.

But like I said, you guys help keep me sane. This forum has been my support when I was in so much pain.

I wonder what it takes for your other half to become proactive.

**caterpillar79** · 02-08-2010 11:44 AM

Here I am, talking myself out from crying.

Every time I think of my immigration paper work, I almost could not keep myself calm. I'm so glad we don't have school today.

I'm reminding myself at how loving and caring my husband is to me, and how he himself is dealing with the same stress that I am having now. I should be happy he is very supportive to me, always emotionally and mentally present to lift me up - indeed very dependable.

I could not see myself living away from him for a long time, say even a month.

This is me, venting.

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 02-08-2010 01:59 PM

Cat.

Irrespective of the emotions, the reasons.. We have to learn to deal with them. If we don't they manifest and create a huge black hole that we want to be swept away with.

Is that really who we are?

No.

The Universe is a testing thing, over and over and over. We are given obstacles to jump, over and over again. You visualize this long road and can't see the end of it.

Well, that's where you need "attitude", "positive affirmations", "belief", "I can", "I will" and those thoughts and words become the only ones in existence.

Fun-ally enough, with that, it works... and things happen in the right direction. If your mind is only thinking positively, then only positive outcomes will occur and each obstacle you see with a smile, knowing that you can and will jump one too because you believe.

I am a survivor, no matter what is thrown at me, I know I will succeed and that power is amazing, as I do, it outruns any form of negative that occurred, due to the success.

Use those words... Know those words. Have attitude.. and succeed with all of this...

CW

**caterpillar79** · 02-08-2010 05:44 PM

Thank you, CW. Even if I have not read your post right away, you proved yourself right. Just lately, after venting here, I got a call from my loving husband who arranged for a phone conference with our lawyer. We discussed about the deal and got some issues cleared.

I knew, I believe and I am positive. It's just the old part of me that comes out once in a while always afraid of the unknown, becoming anxious, just couldn't wait for a few more things to happen or work out.

This is the new me being tested right now. I am very blessed to have such an unbelievably capable, secure and caring husband, and you, MUM, as well as WC and all the lovely people here.

I trust, I believe, I can...no, WE can, for I no longer speak for myself, but for my husband and I.