Thread: Why men are happier!

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Originally Posted by Brighteyes
The garage is all yours.

The rest of the house is all yours.
Because you refuse to clean it, so you gave it to us.

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Wedding plans take care of themselves.
Or we risk being stabbed with the cake knife.
Because, you would have remembered the alcohol and forgotten the food, if you were in charge.


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Chocolate is just another snack.
You've got ice cream.
Actually, we thought the chocolate was to melt over.. never mind:P


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The world is your urinal.
You just have to lean back a bit more.
Na we can squat, we're ladies.

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You don’t have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
Righty tighty, lefty loosy.
Wrong, your the nut, so then we bolt:P


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People never stare at your chest when you’re talking to them.
People never stare at your crotch when you're talking to them.
1 right, sort off, I'll give you that.



That's my story and I'm sticking to it!


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New shoes don’t cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
New boots can!

2, you can have that one as well...


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Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
Ten seconds if it's two men talking!

Hey Dad! That's a TV Show
Hey Son! He mean't to say, how much do you want?
What's up? See? He knows.
Nothing. You? I'm waiting for it.
Nothing. Later then. See,too chicken to ask
Alright, later. Phew saved some money for a little while longer.


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You know stuff about tanks and engines.
And bikes and guns and planes and sports. But I could teach you.
She mean't our tanks, and our engines


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A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
You don't need three backups for every single outfit!

Nup, cause women go out of our way to look good, you just pack board shorts, and t-shirts...

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Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.




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Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
Tennis shoes, formal shoes, work boots. Yup!
Cause, Man decided women must wear, bikinis, short dresses, long dresses, tights, sexy underwear, makeup, hair up, or down, evening dresses, we therefore, have no choice, 3 suitcases it is.

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You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
Can't even tell if the colors match.
That's cause your still trying to work out the world " cool"

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Everything on your face stays its original colour.
Nobody is forcing you to wear makeup. In fact, it just covers the natural beauty of a lot of women!
Pftttttttt... but you lot love hot red lipstick don't ya, with that sexy underwear...

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The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
Going on twenty years now. Just because with me, less hair equals more.
Whereby we can change it, from blonde to brunette, put our sunglasses on, walk down the street past you and you won't recognise us, but we will ALWAYS recognise you.

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You only have to shave your face and neck.
Nobody is forcing you to shave anything else. As long as you're five o'clock shadow isn't darker than mine, I don't care one bit.
He's been away from this Forum for too long, please read the threads pertaining to preference, down there...seems again, it's all Man's fault.


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You can play with toys all your life.
So can you. Dildos, vibrators..
But, they are aids, not toys, you guys, have to buy that new ute, or the motor bike, or wait, that's mid life crisis, when we reach there, we just want more sex:P

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You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.
I wish. But online shopping weeks in advance certainly beats running the stores just days before Christmas.

Na, you can, "what's on special?"... man/ woman / child, 6 of those, 10 of those, 4 of those, thanks... done...

A man with ALL the answers!....surely not.....just can't happen EVER

SURELY NOT!!!!!!!!