Interracial Dating

**DRoxy** · 09-17-2010 10:57 PM

My bf and I have been dating for almost 4 years now. He is Pakistani and I am Hondurian American. Due to us being from two complete different cultures his family had a hard time accepting it. My family on the other hand was really accepting. My mother in the beginning was apprehensive about the whole thing but now she loves him. My bf's sibling love me , but i'm not sure his parents are that point yet , but are very nice none the least. Do you guys think its harder dating someone outside your race ?

**kristalyn_04** · 09-17-2010 11:37 PM

I don't see anything wrong with it... people are so quick to judge. I tried dating someone outside of my race before, and my family had an issue with it. Now I just don't bother because I decided it's not worth dealing with the discrepancies in my family because of it. I've tried to open their minds to it but I guess they are too old-fashioned or something, or they judge based on stereotypes. That really annoys me, but, my family comes first and in my mind it's not worth risking my relationship with my family. If it wasn't for that, I wouldn't have anything against an interracial relationship.

**jns** · 09-18-2010 12:40 AM

Things are more difficult when there isn't acceptance by parents. Good luck to the both of you. Learn as much as you can about the others culture and some words of their native language.

**DRoxy** · 09-18-2010 05:43 AM

Krystalyn04 it sucks when ur surroundings is what sometimes make our decision for us. Some people don't date outside their race due to not wanting to deal with the bs of what ppl think or say. I must say I am blessed to have a realy accepting family. Parents are always a lilttle harder to convince but usually come around in time.
jns he has actually learned a little spanish over the yrs. When we go latin places they actually think he is latino and when we go to middle eastern places they think I am middle eatern , its quite hilarious.

**Mes T** · 09-18-2010 08:46 PM

I had a hard time with an Indian ex-boyfriend of mine because his family just was not accepting me, and there we were already years into the relationship. Thing is he was set on having his parents live with us if we got married (as is still a large part of Indian culture), and there was no way I was going to live, in my own house, with people who hated me.

I think interracial relationships are absolutely fantastic. But all this other stuff can be really tough. Granted even with same-race relationships, oftentimes families have a hard time accepting their children's choices anyway.

**DRoxy** · 09-18-2010 09:56 PM

Mes T : its harder to fit into a middle eastern family because they are so set in their ways and culture. From the get go my bf and i have discussed certain things that we know in the long run may cause issues. We have decided to compromise on some and the others we understand that those things can not change just because its just who we are. Both sides of the family should make an effort to be accepting in order for everyone to be happy. In time people will understand.

**WildChild** · 09-18-2010 11:13 PM

Originally Posted by DRoxy

Both sides of the family should make an effort to be accepting in order for everyone to be happy. In time people will understand.

Unfortunately you can't count on this. If you stay together you may have to both accept that there will be some distance. Muslim culture does make some allowance for a man marrying outside his faith, although there is no tollerance for a woman doing so.

**DRoxy** · 09-19-2010 09:01 AM

I am hopeful that his parents will continue to come around. I am very optimistic that everything will turn out well in the future. Yes, it will have it challenges , but hey no one ever said life was easy.

**North** · 09-20-2010 11:33 PM

I understand to an extent. I am an ethnic Jew and I am currently seeing someone who is not ethnically or religiously Jewish. Dealing with unintended anti-semitism is incredibly hard when you're dating someone who has no concept of what they're saying and are 'just trying to be funny'. His friends tend to say very hurtful and inappropriate things as well.
It's harder, but you just have to lay down what is acceptable and what isn't.

**SidneyAlive** · 01-23-2011 04:15 AM

i went out with a black guy in high school for around two months, my family didn't say much about it, but his family didn't care for me at all so it didn't work out..

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