Would you?
If you lived with your SO, and made plans with a friend to have dinner and hang out one night, and later found out your SO was going to unexpectedly be off work that night, would you ditch your friend to hang with him?
Honestly. Would you?
"Be what you're looking for."
"The next time you're thinking of kicking someone when they're down, offer them your hand and help them back up instead."
If I lived with him, no I more than likely wouldn't be canceling any plans to spend the evening with him rather than my friend. If we DIDN'T live together, it may be debatable. It's all apart of having your own life and being able to still do stuff on your own. Hopefully, he would understand.
Friendship Prayer
May the fleas of a thousand camels infest the crotch of the person who screws up your day and may their arms be too short to scratch.
Amen
Whoever said anything was possible obviously never tried slamming a revolving door.
It would depend on the state of the relationship, even living together... if its a couple that hasn't gotten to spend the time together that would make their relationship run smoother and an opportunity presented itself... I can see why someone would blow off a friend, hoping they'd understand, in order to spend some quality time with their significant other.
If the relationship is smooth and they have plenty of time with each other, I'd think blowing off the friend would be fairly insensitive and rude...but like all things... there must be some mitigating factors for a friend to do that. Maybe ones she hasn't disclosed as to why she felt she needed that extra time with him that she wasn't anticipating.
Scars remind us of where we've been...they don't have to dictate where we're going.
She lives with him. He works C shift, and she works a day shift, so they spend time together every day on weekdays from the time she gets home (4:30pm) to the time he goes to work (11pm). And he's off two days a week...and off weekends every other month. She told me last week things are great between them, better than ever. I haven't seen her in 3 months. She asked me to do something so I said "Sure how about dinner Saturday?", she said "Sounds great!!". Then text me this morning and said "do you want to do dinner on Sunday or maybe one night next week?"....and I said "not tonight?" and she wrote back "No..I just found out last night that Jack took off work tonight". I wrote back "Hmm. :\ " and she didn't respond. No, I don't intend to do anything with her tomorrow or one night this week as she suggested.
Guess I'm just tired of super flaky girls. Was telling my fella about it and asked "How many times have any of your guy friends made plans with you, then last minute say "Sorry, I just found out my girlfriend is taking the night off"? And he said "Well....never". Exactly.
"Be what you're looking for."
"The next time you're thinking of kicking someone when they're down, offer them your hand and help them back up instead."
Personally? I would have called you, and said, hey, would you be upset if we changed our dinner plans, it's just that Jack has the night off which was un-expected and he'd like to do something with me....
I would have reacted the same way based, only, on how she played it out, not that she wanted to change it, as some people, just feel they have to be with their partner, it's their nature...
CW
Do we not realise that in order to find a soul
It doesn't happen over night
if truth were to be told.
Like everything in life that's hard to achieve
you must believe!
Nope. Never. Plans are plans and "live ins" or "shack ups" should understand, just as if they were married.
I think I would've still felt blown off. Mainly because we haven't gotten to hang out in months. And that's mainly because things are going good between them. I'm very happy for her that things have been going better between them the past several months (as he treated her like carp at one time...) but I don't think you should blow off your friends like that. Especially considering she could've done both, she could've said "Lets do dinner at 6 if that's okay. Jack took off tonight and he wants to do something so I told him I would do both."Personally? I would have called you, and said, hey, would you be upset if we changed our dinner plans, it's just that Jack has the night off which was un-expected and he'd like to do something with me....
I would have reacted the same way based, only, on how she played it out, not that she wanted to change it, as some people, just feel they have to be with their partner, it's their nature...
Seeker - I agree with you. Though there may be times and situations I would be understanding of breaking plans, this was just not one of them. And so I begin to wonder, why is it I have really only 2 people in my life that aren't flaky like that? Is it the norm? And if it is, that blows!
"Be what you're looking for."
"The next time you're thinking of kicking someone when they're down, offer them your hand and help them back up instead."
But that's the problem...
Some people live "through" their partner... Or, the partner is controlling, either way, their friends get ditched...
To me that puts you in the acquaintance field...Friends still at least, talk on the phone, keep in touch and make an effort
Do we not realise that in order to find a soul
It doesn't happen over night
if truth were to be told.
Like everything in life that's hard to achieve
you must believe!
If they saw each other infrequently I would understand but under these circumstances, unless something really specially was going on, it would be later, bye.
We can only learn to love by loving. - Iris Mudoch, British writer
I think I need to meet some new people.
Seems like lately, I'm having to put too many people in the "just acquaintance" category. It's disheartening.
Yes WC, I agree. As far as I know, no special circumstances. He just decided last night he was going to take off work tonight....so for her, that meant "oh, i better cancel all my plans so I can be with him".
The common thing around here with most women seems to go as follows:
"Hey want to do something Saturday?"
"Bobby's off on Saturday"
"Oh...ok....how about Friday?"
"I could do something before 6, that's when Bobby gets off work".
I'm SOooooooooooooooooo tired of it.
"Be what you're looking for."
"The next time you're thinking of kicking someone when they're down, offer them your hand and help them back up instead."
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