Pronoia Therapy or 10 Questions Give or Take a Few

**WildChild** · 01-24-2011 08:59 PM

We have a long standing tradition a couple times a year, of creating a thread of questions to give a little insight in to each other, get to know each other, maybe get to thinking a bit. CW tells me it is my turn.

One of the books I'm reading now is Rob Breszny's, Pronoia, this is a re-read, as it a book that everyone should be reading from daily. Pronoia is the belief that the world is conspiring to shower you with blessings. The section of the book entitled, Unabashed Pronoia Therapy has inspired these questions.

1) What causes happiness?
Brainstorm this, map out the foundations of your own happiness. Seriously define what makes you feel good. Name several things.

2) If you were a characture in your best, most wonderful dream, what would you be? Describe it.

3) Many people, when they talk about their childhoods, have nothing but misery to report. No matter how bad your childhood was, there had to be good things to help you become the wonderful person you are today.
Share some glorious moments from your childhood.

4) Sacrifice has become a demoralizing word of deprevation, something done often because you are forced to and that results in loss. Brezsny tells us that the original meaning of the word was, "to give up something valuable in order that something even more valuable might be obtained".
Have you ever given up a mediocre pleasure in order to be free to achieve a greater pleasure?
What do you hold in your life now that you could sacrifice to get something more exalted?

5) The Luck Factor, gives research that you can learn to be lucky. Its a habit you can develop by being open to new experiences, trusting your intuition, expecting good things, finding the bright side.
Name three things you could do to improve your luck.

5) Healing is to cure what is diseased or broken. Medicine heals sick people, counseling heals emotional problems, philathropy may address needs of poverty. Brezsny tells us there is another kind of healing and that is to supercharge what is already healthy. Thinking about this kind of healing, what would you supercharge on yourself and what would you provide to some one you love?

6) Do some thinking and share some ways in which the whole world conspires to help you.

7) How would you help people learn to laugh at themselves? To laugh more?

8) If you could look down and see your life, what is your big picture? What wonderful things are you headed for in life?

AN EXERSIZE:
Have a Bliss Blitz. "During this celebration, you tune out the numbing banality of the daily grind. But instead of shrinking into asceticism, you indulge in uninhibited explorations or joy, release and expansion." "...become inexhaustably resourceful as you search unsurpassable sources of cathartic pleasure. Try it for a day or a week."

**WildChild** · 01-25-2011 11:37 AM

I had a feeling this might be a bit out of the box for many people. After all, all of this requires letting go of what you like to complain of or use as an excuse and think about what is good in your life. Studies have found that it doesn't matter what kind of therapy you do, it is the interaction with the therapist that make you feel better? And understanding where your feelings come from doesn't necessarily help you let go of them but making a choice to be happy, can make you happy? Why? Because studies have found that unhappy people remember the bad stuff and they actually forget or pass over the good stuff. If you want to be happier, you have to train yourself to notice the good stuff. Think about it.

Are ALL the traffic lights really red for you every time? If you start looking for green lights I guarantee you will hit more of them. And if you see the red lights as an opportunity to do something, like a few kegels or some deep breathing, you will appreciate them more and they won't bother you. So leave 5 mins earlier and start paying attention to the good parts of your drive and see what happens.

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 01-25-2011 02:42 PM

Personally it's not out there, it is, very deep and lengthy....:P

It's how many people can actually see good in bad? Can turn a negative into a positive? Not many, although they will try they give up, you know I call that lost souls until they find...

I can firstly see that it's not counselling, it's the interaction with a person, being able to talk, bit by bit, and be listened to, to be maybe guided yes, but the main component being, getting it all out, finally and working it out for yourself, that understanding.....

Now with traffic lights, they are programmed, so if they are red every time, leave 1 minute beforehand, and they will be green all the way through But, yes, changing a negative into a positive as you just did, is to me what it's all about.....

1) What causes happiness?
Brainstorm this, map out the foundations of your own happiness. Seriously define what makes you feel good. Name several things.

An inner peace - calmness - makes everything okay, and therefore that inner peace makes me feel happy

Laughter, whether I say something that makes someone laugh, or do something, or watching someone else laugh, especially from the belly, it makes me happy to see that.

Working hard and seeing the result, simple things like planting gardens and watching them grow, or changing themes, colour schemes, feeling therefore, beauty surrounding me.

Helping someone or something, so that their world is better makes me happy - giving with no expectations of anything in return...

A simple smile, it's amazing when someone walks past you and just smiles, for no reason and you smile back....

2) If you were a characture in your best, most wonderful dream, what would you be? Describe it.

I'd be a witch (only joking)

.. A dream that I fall into whenever I need peace, and remember, is, me, just me, I'm in a room, there is a chair, the room is empty....Then I see my Grandmother, she takes me up into the sky, we float, it's dark... We get to a hole and I look down it, she smiles, I throw something that felt like a huge garbage bag, down the hole, that's over my shoulder and I feel light....I smile.

Next thing you know she's gone and I'm walking up a path...The sun is shining... There is a forest on the right hand side, ahead of me a cliff, and below the cliff the sea. There are yellow dafidills along the path, immediately my deceased cat runs up to me, and walks with me after I cuddle her, then a spider monkey, who I embrase, who jumps in my arms... I see black pansies as well, and colourful plants.... To the left, is a huge white house, African style, balconies, huge staircases, and my grandmother is there waiting for me, waving, smiling on the balcony, I wave back...

When we get to the door, I see big wooden ceiling fans, the beautiful stair case, white..the house is white and there are open shutters, pots glistening and hanging from the ceiling in the kitchen, but I never go further into the house, instead, we all walk to the cliff and watch the sea,all smiling,running, playing....

And that's the end of the dream.......

3) Many people, when they talk about their childhoods, have nothing but misery to report. No matter how bad your childhood was, there had to be good things to help you become the wonderful person you are today.
Share some glorious moments from your childhood.

That's hard WC....I have very limited memory of my childhood....

My grandmother ringing and leaving me a voice message on my phone which was her singing, "I just called to say I love you"...

Again, my grandmother talking about life .....sitting together....

Rollerskating, learning....falling down ....my elbows like mush, swollen, but I kept getting back up and trying over and over again, the sense of that achievement.

Seeing a Lamb in our backyard that must have fallen off a truck:P

Coaching basketball, at 14 - a group of Adult men - umpiring as well...guess again a sense of achievement.

My first kiss at 16:P

My Aunty comforting me when my Grandmother was sick.

A trip to Tasmania playing in the snow.

My Mother, trying to buy a newspaper from a guy on the street, but the lights went green, so she couldn't pass him the money nor him the paper, so she said, as my father wizzed off, "see you tomorrow"....same time, same place.

Sunday drives in the Country, and again, My Mother pointing out old derelict houses stating "that was our honeymoon shack"...and again further down the road same thing, we'd think we were going in circles but off course, it was another house....

My grandmother winding down the window of the car, to view the sea, only it raged up the cliffs and splattered her face, none of us could stop laughing....

Blanch town holiday shack - walking through the country....

Drama at school....and being part of plays.....

My first crush on a teacher ......he had one back on me.....lucky he behaved....

4) Sacrifice has become a demoralizing word of deprevation, something done often because you are forced to and that results in loss. Brezsny tells us that the original meaning of the word was, "to give up something valuable in order that something even more valuable might be obtained".
Have you ever given up a mediocre pleasure in order to be free to achieve a greater pleasure?
What do you hold in your life now that you could sacrifice to get something more exalted?

Owning a Franchise to me was rewarding, but I gave it up, instead of using ego and downsized, strangely I am happier.

Giving up my sleep, holidays, to keep Kia (Husky) as she needs medication 630 am and 630pm...makes me feel warm and happy a sacrifice....

My property manager, I hold dearly and can't let her go, but if I did, I would have alot more money and therefore, a lot more eventual wealth and freedom.....

5) The Luck Factor, gives research that you can learn to be lucky. Its a habit you can develop by being open to new experiences, trusting your intuition, expecting good things, finding the bright side.
Name three things you could do to improve your luck.

Just a notation, I don't gamble because it's wasted money however a couple of times, I tried visualization and stared at the Pokie machines and willed 4 of a kind, it happened, then 3 horses for free games and it happened ...hahaha. Seriously....

I've also put it out there, I want 3 sales ....no time limit, and then just went with the knowing it will happen and it has, three times.....

Believe
Put it out there
And, apply action

5) Healing is to cure what is diseased or broken. Medicine heals sick people, counseling heals emotional problems, philathropy may address needs of poverty. Brezsny tells us there is another kind of healing and that is to supercharge what is already healthy. Thinking about this kind of healing, what would you supercharge on yourself and what would you provide to some one you love?

This is hard work WC, I've made two coffees so far!!!!!!!!!

Well my body is broken slightly but in fairness it's healthy to a degree, so I would walk along the beach for 1hr a day, to supercharge myself

And, make me more alive....

To someone I love? Get him to do the same with me

6) Do some thinking and share some ways in which the whole world conspires to help you.

I purely believe if you want something so bad, you put it out there to the Universe what it is you need help with, ask....and all people come from nowhere and make it happen for you

7) How would you help people learn to laugh at themselves? To laugh more?

Teach them to see the funny side of everything....and, do silly things that makes them laugh as well, out of the blue....so they experience it, including DVD's of comedy, all things that can create it.

8) If you could look down and see your life, what is your big picture? What wonderful things are you headed for in life?

Just to keep loving, giving and loving life WC....retire one day and travel the World, not in luxury, just see it all....with my partner, and my future step daughter,....

AN EXERSIZE:
Have a Bliss Blitz. "During this celebration, you tune out the numbing banality of the daily grind. But instead of shrinking into asceticism, you indulge in uninhibited explorations or joy, release and expansion." "...become inexhaustably resourceful as you search unsurpassable sources of cathartic pleasure. Try it for a day or a week."

Okay, I'll forget the stress of work to come in half and hour and I'll embrase it and go yay this is going to be great and from what I am going to do , good things are going to happen...... and i am going to gain lots of pleasure......then tonight, I'm going to get a different kind of pleasure because I'll be needing it

Very deep WC...

**WildChild** · 03-07-2011 12:32 AM

Admittedly this is a bit intense, especially all in one thread. So I'm going to answer just one at a time.

"1) What causes happiness?
Brainstorm this, map out the foundations of your own happiness. Seriously define what makes you feel good. Name several things."

Happiness is a state of mind, in a very real sense it is a choice. Many things in life are not things to make us happy; illness, accidents, financial disaster, war. But we can chose to find things to be happy about regardless of what else is going on. In the middle of disaster we can still find a moment to recognize the beauty of a flower, a sunset or sunrise, or the comfort of a caring hug. When we allow these windows of recognition or acceptance we open the door to being happy. We don't have to be happy about everything but we can find something no matter how small to brighten our day and the day of those around us.
For my own happiness I try to notice the beauty around me. I will stop to look at a flower, a sparkling icicle or water droplet. Finding things to be grateful to brings happiness too. Saying thank you to a glass of water before you drink, not just eating but really tasting a lucious piece of fruit or a vegetable, will bring greater awareness of how wonderful it is. Another source of happiness can be making a list of things that are bothering me or keeping me from moving forward and dealing with them. There is great satisfaction in crossing something off the list.

Getting to see and talk with a freind brings happiness. A Dove Dark chocolate brings me happiness, so does reading a good book, doing some stitchery, taking a walk.

To me happiness has a strong element of satisfaction, comfort, contentment and wonderment. It isn't as strong or intense as joy or bliss but is simpler on a daily basis.

**Beautiful Disaster** · 03-08-2011 08:53 AM

1) What causes happiness?
Brainstorm this, map out the foundations of your own happiness. Seriously define what makes you feel good. Name several things.Love. Peace. Laughter. One might argue, does the chicken or the egg come first? For me, where there is love, there is a feeling of intense joy. Where there is peace to just be, there is happiness. And where there are belly laughs, whether it's something on tv, or something funny your pet does, there is happiness in that moment. These are the things which make me feel the best in life.

2) If you were a characture in your best, most wonderful dream, what would you be? Describe it. My dreams in which I can see, touch, and experience those in my life who have passed on are my best dreams.

3) Many people, when they talk about their childhoods, have nothing but misery to report. No matter how bad your childhood was, there had to be good things to help you become the wonderful person you are today.
Share some glorious moments from your childhood. The thoughts of my childhood make me smile. We all have bad times, but when I think of mine, I think mostly of the wonderful times, the wonderful love my parents gave to us, the feelings of safety. My brother and I spent most of our time home outdoors, digging, barefooted, played, wrestling, pretending...while my dad tended to the outdoors and mom to the indoors. They made everything so special for us. Still to this day, nothing makes me feel quite like I do when mom comes to visit and has lunch fixed for me on my break, or supper. Reminds me of home and all the little special things she did. Dad was quiet..but powerful. I trusted him to take care of us, and when I laid my head down at night I felt safe....safe from storms...safe from intruders...etc because I knew he'd protect us. I've not felt that safeness even once since he died. I have so many wonderful precious memories.

4) Sacrifice has become a demoralizing word of deprevation, something done often because you are forced to and that results in loss. Brezsny tells us that the original meaning of the word was, "to give up something valuable in order that something even more valuable might be obtained".
Have you ever given up a mediocre pleasure in order to be free to achieve a greater pleasure?
What do you hold in your life now that you could sacrifice to get something more exalted?
That's an incredibly hard question. Right now I sacrifice doing things I "want" to do lots of afternoons to study, so that I can get into my MBA program. I consider it a sacrifice...but a good one.
5) The Luck Factor, gives research that you can learn to be lucky. Its a habit you can develop by being open to new experiences, trusting your intuition, expecting good things, finding the bright side.
Name three things you could do to improve your luck.
-Learn to venture out of my comfort zone more easily
-Listen to myself. Sometimes I know I'm not in the best situation, but my hard head keeps me there rather than listening to what my instincts are telling me and moving on.
-I'm bad about deciding things for people. I might think "Maybe I"ll ask so and so to go do something fun tonight", then I think "no....I'm sure she is with her bf or has other plans" and then at times I don't even ask. Think of the experiences I miss out on by not asking.

5) Healing is to cure what is diseased or broken. Medicine heals sick people, counseling heals emotional problems, philathropy may address needs of poverty. Brezsny tells us there is another kind of healing and that is to supercharge what is already healthy. Thinking about this kind of healing, what would you supercharge on yourself and what would you provide to some one you love? I would supercharge my ego, my inner self. This is where most of my battles in life live. Though I have a pretty good handle on it and pay particular attention to it, it can be further healed. With further healing (supercharging) I believe my abilities would be heightened tremendously and I could truly be a light to those in my life who need me. I fall short at times because it seems like with all the great things going on in life, we focus so exclusively on the bad. Sometimes in my day to day life, I get tired of hearing it, and I know I'm not as empathetic as I could be. That lies within me...not them.

6) Do some thinking and share some ways in which the whole world conspires to help you. Have you ever gone somewhere mistakenly, or by a last minute change of plans and met someone who changed your life? I have. I do frequently. I believe that each of these people is put into my life for sometimes only moments, to give me what I need at that moment and vice versa. I'm always amazed by the chance encounters and where they often lead. In another way, the saying "everything always works out"....is very true.

7) How would you help people learn to laugh at themselves? To laugh more? This is something I try to do daily. I fall short some days, like I said, and when someone is boiling over with negativity I just shut down. Other days (most days) I respond with a smile, something funny to lighten the mood, and let them see that no matter what is going on, I am still happy, I am still smiling. I pick on myself when I do something silly, and I do the same to those around me. It's my way of saying, "We're all imperfect! Let us rejoice and be glad in it!"

8) If you could look down and see your life, what is your big picture? What wonderful things are you headed for in life? I see strength, independence and ambition. I see meeting goals and feeling the rewards of them. I see myself experiencing the kind of love that I've always dreamed about, feeling no doubts etc. I see myself making a difference. I see myself buying a lot of land out in the country and building a home away from it all, private, peaceful.