Paying For Sex

**jns** · 07-20-2011 12:04 AM

What problems does paying for sex or titillation cause in society? How are the problems from paying for sex visited on normal relationships? Google [growing demand for prostitution Newsweek] for an article on this and look for the Newsweek article. I learned a new phrase: "somatic dissociation". Comments?

**Texinator** · 07-20-2011 10:26 AM

An extremely depressing article. Especially concerning:

"Overall, the attitudes and habits of sex buyers reveal them as men who dehumanize and commodify women, view them with anger and contempt, lack empathy for their suffering, and relish their own ability to inflict pain and degradation.

Farley found that sex buyers were more likely to view sex as divorced from personal relationships than nonbuyers, and they enjoyed the absence of emotional involvement with prostitutes, whom they saw as commodities. “Prostitution treats women as objects and not ... humans,” said one john interviewed for the study.

In their interviews, the sex buyers often voiced aggression toward women, and were nearly eight times as likely as nonbuyers to say they would rape a woman if they could get away with it. Asked why he bought sex, one man said he liked “to beat women up.” Sex buyers in the study committed more crimes of every kind than nonbuyers, and all the crimes associated with violence against women were committed by the johns."

...and the thing is, apparently this isn't limited to prostitution, but also men who purchase sex in the form of porn, strip clubs, and phone sex.

**jns** · 07-20-2011 08:39 PM

Tex, too bad others aren't joining in on the conversation.

**Texinator** · 07-20-2011 09:06 PM

Maybe the stopped reading because they were too disgusted... lol For example, buyers are eight times more likely than non buyers to rape a woman if they could get away with it? Do humanity a favor and go rape a blender!

**jns** · 07-20-2011 10:11 PM

A statement I hadn't heard of: "whereas the legalization of prostitution in the Netherlands, Germany, and much of Australia led to an explosive growth in demand that generated an increase in trafficking and other crimes."

**rcoreyus** · 07-20-2011 10:57 PM

Was the cause and effect clear? Does purchasing sex services make men more abusive toward women, or are more abusive men more likely to purchase sex services. I'm also not sure how they can track the use of these services once they are legalized, difficult to get equivalent statistics.

The article seem to also lump together very different things. The underage girl who runs away from home and winds up being pimped as a way to support herself is to me a very different think from an adult woman who decides to act as a high priced call girl or porn star because of the high pay.

They also assume as negative some things that aren't necessarily bad. “Over time, as a result of their prostitution and pornography use, sex buyers reported that their sexual preferences changed and they sought more sadomasochistic and anal sex,”

This is implicitly assuming that anal sex and S&M are bad. Obviously if they are coerced they are, but I know women who enjoy both.

I think there are some really awful sides to the sex industry - under-age workers, women who are pressured or coerced, or in some cases directly enslaved or raped. There is disease and abuse of all sorts. On the other hand there are a lot of cases of women who are voluntarily making money doing something that they want to do.

For a variety of reasons, I'd never use the services of a prostitute, but I don't necessarily condemn those who do, or those who choose to make money that way.

I though the article had a pretty serious bias.

**jns** · 07-20-2011 11:31 PM

Google [primer male demand prostitution ilvi] for a basis of some of the claims.

**jns** · 07-20-2011 11:45 PM

For an additional resource Google [Deconstructing The Demand for Prostitution].

**pompano** · 07-21-2011 12:55 AM

I would never pay for sex to be honest.

**stressed** · 07-26-2011 01:52 AM

Originally Posted by jns

What problems does paying for sex or titillation cause in society?

I think problems in society cause prostitution. If men didn't have to turn to prostitution then it wouldn't exist.

Some choose it because they feel they have no other choice (can't find sex), others because they see women as objects (probably as a way to get back at women for being aware of their sexual rights and having the choice to have sex with whoever they want, whenever they want, without having fingers pointing at them) and others because they want to perform sexual acts they wouldn't dare perform with a partner (again, because women are able to say 'no'). Others choose it because "it's what men do". Overall, I think women have it easier to get sex than men, hence paying for sex is more of a male hobby than a female one.

Originally Posted by jns

How are the problems from paying for sex visited on normal relationships?

If a man pays for sex when his partner is against it then they shouldn't be together. Different values and lifestyles cause serious issues.