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Thread: What does the invite in for a nightcap REALLY mean?

  1. #1
    Junior Member Array
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    Aug 2011

    Default What does the invite in for a nightcap REALLY mean?

    Hi. New to this site and have a scenario I'd like some opinions on. Thanks. -When a woman invites a man into her place after a first or second date, (let's say they knew eachother from years back as friends only) how often is it with the intention of it possibly becoming physical should things go well? As a guy, my friends and I say it's 99.9%. We think you girls KNOW that we are thinking and hoping it will lead to sex or at least some hot making out or else why are they inviting us in at midnight? Some female co-workers disagree but we just don't buy it lol. So what is the inside scoop on this.

  2. #2
    Silver Contributor 100+ Posts Array
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    Aug 2011


    Really, it depends on the woman. For me, it's actually not unusual to go somewhere at 2am just to hang out, or to just hang out after a date. Just because a woman invites you in to talk (or whatever) doesn't mean she's wanting/expecting anything more.

  3. #3
    APRIL 2011 POSTER OF THE MONTH Array ItsASecret's Avatar
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    Apr 2009
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    Men WANT the reason to be sex, they want all situations like that to be about sex, the fantasy of not seeing someone in ages and then being invited for a hard core sex romp. I would be leery of your "bro's" advice on this one lol. A situation like this is simply is not all about sex with all women. If she makes the move then fine see where it leads, however I would not start probing or touching her with her in hopes that it will turn into a scene pulled from a porno. It is very common to just see someone at night for a glass of wine to catch up. Not all adults go to bed at 9pm, some get home at 9pm and still make plans afterwards. It is all individual and you would have to see how she acts how she holds herself during the time. It is simply not a total invitation for sex so I would go over and be friendly, you know catch up if you have not seen each other in a long time. Nothing wrong with some old friends getting together for a laugh or two but I would not go into it with your hopes up that sex happens. It could happen absolutely, you will only know if you go, however just keep the main reason as seeing her for the friendship and not sex.
    There are those who believe that dictionaries should not merely reflect the times but also protect English from the mindless assaults of the trendy.

  4. #4
    Junior Member Array bleachedpink's Avatar
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    Aug 2011


    LOL, does anyone even say "nightcap" anymore? Yeah, guys want to believe everything means you want to jump in the sack, so on the rare times that I'll invite one in after a date I'm very specific. Like "come in for coffee," or whatever.

  5. #5
    March 2008 "Poster of the Month" Array
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    Sep 2007


    I would think that being invited to a woman's (or man's) room after a date allows one to make some sort of (polite) sexual advance. That does not mean it will be accepted, or give permission to do something crude.

  6. #6
    Banned from WH Array
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    May 2010


    The words Nightcap bring to mind the fact that someone ( Invitee ) does not want the Date to end at the Doorstep. Maybe have some private time to discuss the Date, plan another Date, talk and get to know the other a bit better, show them your home.

    It could be an invitation to " Neck or Make Out ". But I would Not expect Straight out Sex. Though there is the Possibility it could happen. Either way, It is an Invitation to continue the evening.

    How you handle it, is what counts. When getting to know someone, this could very well be a Test. Test of Interest, Compatibility or Test of Behavior morals.

    If it was within the first few dates, The Respectful ...

    " Thanks, but maybe after we know each other a bit better, because I'd hate to compromise our new founded relationship, as my liking your company might get too advance too quickly " .

    Would be an response that would really pique my interest to know him better. He would be a Gentleman and still show his attraction and willingness to see me again.
    Then again, should the Sexual Electricity be Mutual, I'd not invite him in for a Nightcap unless I had one of these for him to wake up wearing ..

    Dang, is that my Youngest Son ? I'll have to have a talk with him .. Lol

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