Engaged!

**Beautiful Disaster** · 09-20-2011 10:00 AM

Psych! But seriously.... a friend and I were talking about engagements/proposals last night.

So, ladies: If you met the love of your life (or have already met him, been married etc), if you had your choice, would he do the digging and pick out your engagement ring, or would you rather he take you to a store and let you pick out your own? Why?

Gents: From your side of the coin, which would you prefer and why?

**Little** · 09-20-2011 10:12 AM

I got to pick out exactly the ring I wanted, for exactly the price I was willing to have him pay

Our finances were combined long before we got married, so there was no way to surprise me anyways (I hate surprises too, so it was a win-win!) The lack of a surprise pop-the-question hasn't hurt my marriage yet!

**LanaBear** · 09-20-2011 10:25 AM

Holy crp! I just had my stomach hit the floor!

Anyways, same here as with Little. My hubby and I have had our finances combined since we were 18, long before we were ever married and I handle them, so no spending money without me seeing it. We were young and dirt poor back then, so we didn't spend a lot but it was a ring I picked out.

However, a few months before we got married his boss showed him a gorgeous ring he picked up at an estate sell and my husband fell in love with it. He worked out a deal with his boss and got it for ridiculously cheap and gave it to me one night, told me that I could decide which one I liked, but really really like this one. I did too, I fell in love with it. It has a very unique setting and I've never seen anything remotely close to it. A few years later, I was in the process of getting all my jewelry appraised for insurance purposes and ended up getting it appraised. It appraised for for about 30 times more than my husband paid for it, lol. Much to both of our amazement.

**rosekitten** · 09-20-2011 10:37 AM

I actually got to design mine. :S Perks of having a daddy as a jeweler.

**KMonte85** · 09-20-2011 10:41 AM

I wanted to have some say in the ring I was wearing because, well, *I* have to look at it for conceivably the rest of my life and would like to have a bit of input.

Buttttt that didn't happen.

When my fiance bought the ring he did it without me around. He took another ring of mine to the jeweler to make sure he had the right size and picked out something he loved and he thought I would love. And (lucky for him

) he was right on! I couldn't have picked a better ring out myself. I LOVE it. As much of a planner, thinker, organizer that I am, I really do appreciate that he did this without me and so was able to surprise me with a proposal. It made it "special" because it was allll his doing and he was so right on about everything.

**Seeker_Advice** · 09-20-2011 12:31 PM

Oh Lord...here we go again....

I'm a big surprise guy...I like to create special/romantic surprises for my SO, so during the time we have been dating, I have pretty much nailed down what she is looking for in a ring and a stone.

As some of you may recall from previous similar posts, "what size should the stone be?" remains an ongoing debate within myself, as I am able to provide her with more than she could possibly imagine.

To answer your question:

I prefer to surprise her.

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 09-20-2011 02:57 PM

OMG BD, don't do that to me, I couldn't click open fast enough engaged? NOOOOOOO

My ex-husband designed the engagement ring himself and proposed... Admittedly the diamonds were his Mothers hense why, and there were three large ones with beautiful clarity but the design I didn't really like, so the excitement I think wasn't the same.

My now fiance and I went looking together. For what ever reason (perhaps as I was married before), he wanted me to have white gold this time but I thought as well, that, that change would be nice. Doesn't mean I can't wear yellow gold on the other hand ever...So we tried a few on and picked the one we liked together the most... 4 small diamonds as a square with diamonds going down each side, and the wedding ring to match sits around the square also with diamonds going down each side.

I think I preferred the togetherness. I found it hard to wear something I didn't really like to the fullest, I think rings are personal. Or jewelerly in any event.

**Mes T** · 09-21-2011 02:13 AM

OMG BD what the!!!

Grr...

Anyway yeah I keep hearing of couples going out together and purchasing rings... Personally I think there needs to be a bit of romance in the whole thing, which going together to the shop sort of kills for me. But then again I ALSO expect the guy I'm going to marry to know exactly what I would want... yeah right...

I wouldn't mind flipping through a catalogue together and seeing what style of ring we think is nicest... But then I would want him to go out and get it himself.

**kristalyn_04** · 09-21-2011 06:49 AM

OMG BD you seriously just scared the carp out of me lol's.

Anyway, I'm really not a material girl... the ring isn't what's important. As long as he picked it out with his heart, then I would most likely love it and wear it proudly. I know that's so cheesy but that's how I feel on the subject.

**Beautiful Disaster** · 09-21-2011 03:53 PM

HEhehehe!! Me like scaring you all.

I wanted to hear your opinions before I gave mine. But as my friend I were discussing, we agreed that for SOME women they need to be involved and find it incredibly romantic that a man sort of opens the doors and says "what do you like"? But for both of us....we agreed that it would be incredibly romantic if a man was sneaky, digging behind the scenes to find out what you would love, then picking out something that when he looked at, just screamed his love for you. And that even if it wasn't your "dream ring" or the cut you had always thought you wanted, it would mean so much to know he picked it out just for you. So I think I'm definitely the kind of girl that would like to be surprised.