Sexualizing Children

**jns** · 09-25-2011 12:19 PM

I read an interesting article about society sexualizing children. It can be found by Googling [end innocence cost sexualizing kids]. It is from a conservative source - the Deseret News - but the issue is societal, not political. Comments?

**Crystalblue** · 09-25-2011 03:40 PM

I think this has been an issue for a long time. I remember hearing debates about Barbie dolls, just like I hear now about Bratz. It still sells an image of what women are supposed to look like. There are endless examples that didn't make the article. Anybody else wonder what happened to Tinker Bell? They put her image in poses that make me shudder to think that it's being sold to little girls. Most parents have fear about what theses images are doing to their children, but it's everywhere. Sex sells. I think it'll continue and get worse. All a parent can do is monitor what goes on at home, and even then, as soon as the tv goes on...

I try to teach my boys to respect and be curteous to everyone. My youngest asked me if girls could race cars. I told him, girls can do everything boys can do, except pee standing up. He got a giggle out of that. I want them to grow up knowing that women are not objects for a man's pleasure. It's scary to think about the images being constantly pushed on society and how confusing that is for children still developing. They're being sold lies about what healthy interaction should be.

What happens when they can't find that perfectly formed woman who's happy with being treated like an object? I would hate for my kids to grow up thinking that's all women are, and according to the media, there wouldn't be anything wrong with that behavior. The best I can think to do is make sure that they know it's better to admire a person for their actions and accomplishments, than for their physical features.

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 09-25-2011 03:44 PM

I can't google that JNS, probably because it won't show up here in Aussie Land

You bring great conversations to the table thank you.

Here in Australia, we have a magazine for teenagers called "Girlfriend" there has been alot of debate over the context within the magazine. Whilst it focuses on teenagers and the growing of a teenager in all aspects, there is a sealed off section which is yet to be desired in my opinion, where teenagers ask and pose questions such as "can I do oral with braces?", or " I am 12 he is 13, we don't think we can hold off on sex any longer, do you think it's okay to have sex at that age?

The editors off course, simply reply with the legalities of age... Which by the way shocked me that Victoria, has a rule of as long as you are two years apart, you can be between 10 and 16?

The other issues are pagents I mentioned that before, whereby Mothers are displaying their children at only 5 or 6, dressed up, dolled up, to win thousands of dollars and be crowned, in one instance a little girl was dressed as Julia Roberts as a prostitute, as per her movie, wrong in my opinion.

Then there is the laws here that suggest it is wrong for a little one to run around naked anymore? Why, we did as kids, I appreciate there is a cut off age, but I see no harm in brothers and sisters seeing each other naked at 3 or 4 years of age, nor the parents walking around naked so the children know what they will look like when they get older, it's the way my parents were and there's before, although Daddy dearest didn't I accidently found that out by walking into the bathroom one day whilst he was in a shower and nearly died of a heart attack

Good thread as usual JNS

**jns** · 09-25-2011 04:21 PM

Originally Posted by CHANDLERS WISH

I can't google that JNS, probably because it won't show up here in Aussie Land

You bring great conversations to the table thank you.

Here in Australia, we have a magazine for teenagers called "Girlfriend" there has been alot of debate over the context within the magazine. Whilst it focuses on teenagers and the growing of a teenager in all aspects, there is a sealed off section which is yet to be desired in my opinion, where teenagers ask and pose questions such as "can I do oral with braces?", or " I am 12 he is 13, we don't think we can hold off on sex any longer, do you think it's okay to have sex at that age?

The editors off course, simply reply with the legalities of age... Which by the way shocked me that Victoria, has a rule of as long as you are two years apart, you can be between 10 and 16?

The other issues are pagents I mentioned that before, whereby Mothers are displaying their children at only 5 or 6, dressed up, dolled up, to win thousands of dollars and be crowned, in one instance a little girl was dressed as Julia Roberts as a prostitute, as per her movie, wrong in my opinion.

Then there is the laws here that suggest it is wrong for a little one to run around naked anymore? Why, we did as kids, I appreciate there is a cut off age, but I see no harm in brothers and sisters seeing each other naked at 3 or 4 years of age, nor the parents walking around naked so the children know what they will look like when they get older, it's the way my parents were and there's before, although Daddy dearest didn't I accidently found that out by walking into the bathroom one day whilst he was in a shower and nearly died of a heart attack

Good thread as usual JNS

CW, a lot of people are too prudish and too insecure to appear around their children nude, even in a normal context, such as home. One benefit is that little boys and little girls can see that men are not perfect nor are women. And as you point out, they can see what they will look like as an older adult. It kills the curiosity and also can blunt the advertising and media messages about having to be perfect. After all mommy and daddy are OK, so what is being said isn't the only way things can be and is not necessary. I wonder if children who go to nude beaches with their parents are better adjusted about this?

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 09-26-2011 04:10 AM

I think the oldern days were better, if they were to just live, forget TV , You Tube, and the Magazines, girls would be in a better place.

Having viewed those links (thank you for sending them through), it is evident that MEDIA is causing the problem.

The girls do not realise the air brushing, the celulite removed in photos, the diets these girls go on, starve themselves, the drugs, alcohol they take through lonliness, the star in the mirror that they are fat yet, they are almost anorexic, the sploitation of women in the work force, nightclubs even in cages in bikinis, anything, to turn a male on?

Is that the ploy? It seems to be based on how men will suck it all in...What is the benefit of seeing a woman skinny, toned to another woman? Weight loss pills? Or is the people that are trying to make money using women to attract men to purchase and to attract women to not think, be themselves and see a picture of that dream woman whom attracts all the men, again it appears to end up with males.

Even on Forums if you aren't logged into the Forum and go to the front page it's simular for guests apparently, it attracts people whom are in-deed self conscious but they are so, because of people whom are and want to make money off of the person they are advertising, what they are advertising for their benefit. That is not intentional rather the trend and obviously how to attract people to read..But the point I am making is it's everywhere, women are exploited always have been always will be and children, being sexualized takes it into teenagers which are still learning, therefore, still children in my mind...

I know of alot of young girls I have spent 4 years with, that keep using sex themselves, the look, anything they can get their hands on to attract men, not realising that, that only attracts sex, nothing more...due to these things and then cutting comes into it..

I watched for 1 minute, football and the awards the WAGS these women are paper thin, wearing the best, the most expensive, working towards getting a sponser to give them the dress to wear after all they will mention whom's clothes they are wearing, thousands of dollars size 4, to look good for their man? Whom, will or will not win based on his achievements ghaaa

Go back to the little children, being sexualized for parents rewards of thousands at pagents....

All to sad, because again that attracks we know what, including murder.

**Crystalblue** · 09-26-2011 07:05 AM

It's very depressing. Marketing is training girls at a younger and younger age that they're not good enough without the right products. Not only do you need a twig thin figure with perfect boobs, but women need the right clothes, the right shoes, don't forget accessories, and that's only the tip of the ice burg. Manis, pedis, facials, perfumes, lotions, and should we get into hair and makeup? This stuff is great to make a women feel special, but I remember feeling like I had to use this stuff. That was at 11 or 12 when I started noticing everything I lacked. I imagine it's younger now. Pretty soon they'll be coming out with the diet pill for 5 year olds.

I get it. In marketing the idea is to make people think they would be better off with the product. That's how they make the sale, but how do you explain that to children that are still trying to figure it out?

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 10-02-2011 02:04 AM

It is depressing but it also is a good topical thread, therefore I would like to bring it up....

CW

**wevibe** · 10-05-2011 04:22 AM

The sexualization of children and adolescents epidemic has been all over the news and across the internet, partly due to the recent announcement from Mattel, Inc and Nickelodeon that Dora the Explorer is going skank, but also because of the new Tattoo Barbie, Pregnant Barbie and other toys for children and clothes that are sexualizing girls and boys at a very young age.

**Crystalblue** · 10-06-2011 01:00 PM

Lol. Seriously! I'll have to check that out. Schools in so tv time has been very limited for the kids, mostly to the football games dad is watching. It's very rare that I even turn the tv on anymore, but my husband watches tv after he gets home from work. I still see plenty of advertising, which means so do the kids. But come on! Dora is for pre-k kids.

How do you change society to remember what's exceptable? I think it really just boils down to what sells. That means parents are buying. Is this just a younger generation of parents that are ok with little kids having sex appeal, or a case of just not being aware?

**Little** · 10-06-2011 01:47 PM

Baby Dora shows more skin than Tween Dora. I fail to see how she's "going skank." They've even left her a flat chest, though plenty of tweens are well-developed.

I also think there is a distinction between sexualizing children and letting them pretend to be little grownups. Big girls have boobies and hips. Big girls wear makeup. Big girls have boyfriends, they go on dates, they grow up and get married and have babies. And grown up girls have sex. So where is the disconnect between healthy grown-up sex and little-girl sexualization? Does it have something to do with Western society's hush-hush half-shameful relationship with sexual acts? Sex sells, but women who have sex are "skanks" or worse. Pregnancy isn't something to celebrate, it's something to revile, especially if the mother looks a day short of 35 - because pregnancy means SHE HAD SEX. And the most basic act of baby feeding - nursing FROM THE BREAST as nature designed - is seen as exhibitionist, perverted, child abuse, and as bad as drug addiction (yes, seriously.)

CB hits it on the head - parental purchasing power is fueling this disconnect. If parents skip the store with the "get into our pants" advertisement, if they skip the TV shows that aren't for their child's age range, if they skip the toys that they don't think are appropriate, regardless of the age on the box, if they skip the clothes with objectifying words printed on the behind, then sex won't be selling to kids anymore, will it? With every parent that chooses to skip, there's one less sale. The demographic that makes sex NOT sell is just a little bit bigger.

Of course, there will still be the "other" parents and their kids to derail your work. Short of pulling your kids out of school, you can only do your best to impress upon your kids that they are important above, beyond, but also including their bodies. I read an opinion piece recently about examining what you say to kids, especially kids you don't know or are just meeting.

What's the first thing you say to a little girl when you meet her the first time? Is it that she's soooo pretty? You like her dress? You like her hair? What about a boy - is it that he looks so big and so strong? The article talked about connecting with children on an intellectual level instead. What kind of books do they like? What's their favorite subject in school? What do they like to do in their free time? It's hard, especially when they are SO DARN CUTE and people will look at you like you have two heads for not saying so, but I feel like this idea can really turn the tide just as much as purchasing power.