Guy in need of some advice

**dh05** · 11-04-2011 09:31 AM

Hi ladies,

I hope you don't mind me coming on your forum briefly. I'm 27 years old and have noticed my hair thinning the last two years - I'm just wondering what your opinions are on guys who shave their heads. Is it a turn off for you or are you more attracted to a guy id he has nice hair?

I don't think it suits me personally which is why I'm considering medication to do something about it. It gets me down as I'm newly single and don't want feel too young to be 'past it'.

Can post pics if it helps.

**KMonte85** · 11-04-2011 09:42 AM

Welcome to the forum dh! This may be a women's health forum, but don't let that make you feel out of place. We welcome all members, and have quite a few male contributors here!

As for a man's hair or non-hair, I guess, for me it doesn't really matter. I don't mind guys who shave their heads bald, I think they can be very attractive.

However, what's most attractive to me and I would say most other women, regardless of hair vs. no hair, is self-confidence in man. An insecure man with a thick head of hair is far less attractive to me than a confident, secure man with thin hair or bald.

**dh05** · 11-04-2011 09:47 AM

Thanks for the welcome and thanks for the comment.

I'm not going to lie - this has caused me to lose some confidence. I still have a decent amount of hair to the average person on the street but I hate seeing it first thing in the morning...knowing that I have to wash/dry it and have it cut short to avoid the thinner parts becoming obvious. It just makes me feel less attractive because I was always a 'get up and go' sort of person...or even a 'get up and have sex' sort of person....now I'd worry about how my hair would look as ridiculous as that sounds. Then there's knowing it is only going to get worse unless I either try to 'treat it' or finally shave it all off and accept it.

**KMonte85** · 11-04-2011 10:00 AM

Acceptance is HUGE. Everyone in the world has insecurities, things they wish were better about themselves - you're not alone there. It makes you human. The key is just to not allow your insecurities make you an insecure person. I'm not a snaggletooth, but my teeth are no where near perfect, and many mornings I wake up, brush my teeth, and think about how I wish they were straighter and whiter. BUT I don't let that stop me from smiling.

Catch my drift?

Don't let thinning hair take your gusto away. Because women will most likely not notice if your hair is thinning or if you shaved it all off, but they will catch on quite quickly that your letting your hair stop you from enjoying life.

**dh05** · 11-04-2011 10:17 AM

Yep - I get what you're saying.

I suppose what I am thinking is :

1) do I just shave it all off and accept it in that way
2) do I leave it and accept it in the way that says I don't care (even though realistically I do because I hate feeling 'untidy' and like i need to groom it)
3) do I take a pill once a day (with a smallish risk of side effects) which could stop it getting any worse for quite some time so that I can forget about it in that way?

My difficulty is that when I did shave my head, I had family members and some friends commenting that I should grow it back because it looked better - those comments hurt me enough to fear losing it all (which I will eventually ). I also had some of the 'thug' comments which wasn't great because I'm not like that at all.

**KMonte85** · 11-04-2011 10:56 AM

Originally Posted by dh05

1) do I just shave it all off and accept it in that way
2) do I leave it and accept it in the way that says I don't care (even though realistically I do because I hate feeling 'untidy' and like i need to groom it)
3) do I take a pill once a day (with a smallish risk of side effects) which could stop it getting any worse for quite some time so that I can forget about it in that way?

How do you feel most comfortable? Do you like the way you look with a shaved head? Family and friends will tease because it is a different style. Same as the flak a woman gets when she changes her brunette hair to red or blonde, or cuts it into a cute pixie style. They stop commenting as soon as they get used to it.

I'd be cautious of the pills and the side effects. Putting unneccessary chemicals in your body just so you can have some hair doesn't seem like it's your best option.

**Seeker_Advice** · 11-04-2011 11:11 AM

Dude! C'mon! Really?

Guy to guy... Self confidence rules! Just as was stated above. Frankly, I've never understood the whole "losing my hair panic" thing as i went thin then grey way before I should have for my age...I guess. Who knows, as there is only one me, one you, etc. but all of my buddies of same or similar age are no where near as grey/thin as I am.

Just remember this one rule...for the rest of your life....The thinner it gets, the shorter it goes!

Remember "Uncle Earl's" comb over? Don't even think about it.

We don't get to pick our parents or our gene pool, so go and recover some of that self confidence that washed down the drain and only spend time with women who appreciate you for you...just the way you are.

Chemicals in your body? To possibly save some hair? Really?

Your body is a temple...treat it accordingly.

**dh05** · 11-04-2011 11:52 AM

Right now I'm most comfortable with it very short because I hate how it looks at the temples - the starting to go bald look. And apparently my crown is thinning a fair bit too so shorter makes it less obvious.

Yeah, I know - I've never liked the idea of putting chemicals in my body - especially for something like hair loss - but I just hate the feeling of ageing before my time...(I missed out on a lot as a teenager and in my early twenties due to a genuine health problem which is now thankfully cured). My dad was completely bald by the time he was 31-32 and there's a part of me that wants to stop that from happening if I can.

**dh05** · 11-04-2011 11:58 AM

Originally Posted by Seeker_Advice

Dude! C'mon! Really?

Guy to guy... Self confidence rules! Just as was stated above. Frankly, I've never understood the whole "losing my hair panic" thing as i went thin then grey way before I should have for my age...I guess. Who knows, as there is only one me, one you, etc. but all of my buddies of same or similar age are no where near as grey/thin as I am.

Just remember this one rule...for the rest of your life....The thinner it gets, the shorter it goes!

Remember "Uncle Earl's" comb over? Don't even think about it.

We don't get to pick our parents or our gene pool, so go and recover some of that self confidence that washed down the drain and only spend time with women who appreciate you for you...just the way you are.

Chemicals in your body? To possibly save some hair? Really?

Your body is a temple...treat it accordingly.

Yeah I know...I wish I could have that attitude. Respect to you for never having cared. Hopefully I can be the same way at some point. It's just something that for some reason I feel embarassed about.

When I first shaved my head (really short...like barely any hair at all) I remember smiling at a woman just to test the water and then looking around to see her laughing with her friend while patting her head. So yeah...baptism of fire. Since I split with my ex I was amazed to see women specifically state things like 'I like a guy with hair, no baldies'...so the more I read/see/hear it/experience the negative side, the more I become insecure about it.

Another thing...I slept with a girl after I split with my ex and she commented to me at some point after 'you know, you should really grow your hair and make the most of it while you still have some'. REALLY sucks to hear all those things when I know for a fact that I'm losing it.

**BabyGirl** · 11-04-2011 01:10 PM

Welcome to the forum, where Boys and Girls can " learn "
about each other . We are Different ( the physical Self ) but all Human .

So, I'm kinda Regular Poster, Very outspoken, in some ways, but in others, I'm the think out of YOUR / MY Impression of Who are You, Who am I , what and Who are my " kids or family ".

My Son ( baby one ) turned 25 yesterday. I got home, asked how his Birthday went . He said he went to a , stumbled a bit on the word Hair Dresser and just said a hair Cut person.
Ok , they trimmed up the back of his neck, side burns, hair into the Beard and he admitted that he thought he was Balding and asked the Question .

Am I Balding ?
The answer was, no, but you can get more " Volume or looking Thicker " from a shorter or stacked, layered, cut.

It's a little different to him,a bit shorter, neck cleaned and he's is still thinking of the " GQ" corporate thingy. Still wants the (Pony Tail )

In January, he will Cut his Hair ?

I think he will Graduate thru the years to Be Himself and be productive to his family, safety and just basic keep a job, work or move " Higher up " .

He hates Baseball type hats , the old , Cover and Smother ones. I now know he is afraid of " Genetic or Environmental " the uses of Rograin and others, that is why he told me the lady, and she told him, Shorter on Cap looks better for your face.

Bald is not always a Choice, how you Present or Detail yourself is more, the inner feeling, the confidence . Bald or not .. You will be at least Loved by You .