Jokes

**BabyGirl** · 09-14-2011 01:01 PM

An elderly woman went into the doctor`s office. When the doctor asked why she was there, she replied, "I`d like to have some birth-control pills."

Taken back, the doctor thought for a minute and then said, "Excuse me, Mrs. Smith, but you`re 72 years old. What possible use could you have for birth control pills?"

The woman responded, "They help me sleep better."

The doctor thought some more and continued, "How in the world do birth control pills help you to sleep?"

The woman said, "Simple, I put them in my granddaughter`s orange juice every morning and I sleep better at night."

**brunettebabe** · 10-07-2011 11:33 PM

Joke: Why was tigger looking in the toilet?
Answer: He was looking for Pooh

**lucik321** · 10-09-2011 02:50 AM

These jokes are soo funny.

**BabyGirl** · 12-08-2011 06:11 PM

I love this – should we all try it?

My Tax Return was sent back again
in response to my reply to this question:

Please list all your dependents

- I replied -

12 million illegal immigrants;
3 million crack heads;
42 million unemployable people on food stamps,
2 million people in over 243 prisons;
Half of Mexico;
and
535 fools in the U.S. House and Senate."

Apparently, this was NOT an acceptable answer.

**kristalyn_04** · 12-08-2011 06:34 PM

Haha... I love that one BG

**BabyGirl** · 12-08-2011 07:34 PM

Lol Krysta,
I almost didn't post it, Due to the " Politically Correct " attitude
of our Country nowadays ..

But you Know ?

I live here and I have the right to laugh at the " Idjits "

Here's another " PC " one.

I Say Merry Christmas ,Happy Hanuka, Joyous Kwanza
And to the Atheists I just say have a Nice Day.

**BabyGirl** · 12-10-2011 07:38 AM

A little boy wanted $100.00 very badly and

Prayed for weeks, but nothing Happened.

Then he decided to Write God a letter requesting the $100.00.

When The postal Authorities received the

Letter addressed to God, USA They decided to send it to

President Obama.

Obama was so amused that he Instructed his Secretary to send the little boy a $5.00 Bill.

He thought this would appear to be a lot of Money to a little boy.

The little boy was delighted with the $5.00 Bill and sat down to write a thank-you note to God,

Which read:

Dear God:

Thank you very much for sending the Money.However, I noticed that for some reason you Sent it through Washington,D.C.

And those Azzholes took $95.00 in taxes.

**BabyGirl** · 02-19-2012 08:19 AM

I can't believe it has been over a year since someone shared a " joke "

So here goes ...

ONLY A GRANDMOTHER WOULD KNOW...

~A Cup of Tea ~

One day my Gramma was out, and my Grampa was in charge of me.

I was maybe 2 1/2 years old. Someone had given me a little 'tea set' as a gift, and it was one of my favorite toys.

Grampa was in the living room engrossed in the evening news when I brought him a little cup of 'tea', which was just water. After several cups of tea and lots of praise for such yummy tea, my Gramma came home.

My Grampa made her wait in the living room to watch me bring him a cup of tea, because it was 'just the cutest thing!' Gramma waited, and sure enough, here I came down the hall with a cup of tea for Grampa, and she watched him drink it up.

Then she said, (as only a gramma would know), "'Did it ever occur to you that the only place she can reach to get water is the toilet?"