19HelloKitty20
Junior Member

Hey lady! Just thought I'd give you an update. My week end went really well. I was able to shake any negative feelings that came and just enjoy myself and let my BF enjoy himself! The baby monster thought it was cool to make us wait for a whole hour and 1/2 at our meeting place when we went to pick the baby up... but we got past that (with nothing but smiles and grace!) and she is here with us and we are enjoying her!

How was your weekend/holiday?

You have to remember that you are making a choice to stay in the relationship. Stay as positive as possible. Remember that a child is ALWAYS a blessing regardless of the circumstances surrounding the child's conception. I always tell myself I want her to like me more than she likes her mom...lol. But seriously, I just try to be good to the child b/c it is definitely not her fault things are the way they are. I consider her my practice for my own child(ren) someday.

The truth is I still get sad sometimes, I have emotions that seem just plain stupid, and I have friends and my boyfriend and my journal when those moments come. It does get easier as time passes.

Hi Hello Kitty!

I am sooo sorry to hear about what you are going thru. It is a very difficult situation that only you can decide how to handle. As for how I handled my situation... At the beginning I "coped" by having control of all communication. The mother of the child had to communicate with me or through me. There was no communication directly with my boyfriend. Things were handled this way until I felt comfortable (and we found out for certain the child was his), then I relinquished the control and told him he could give her his phone number. Now (the baby is now 15 mths old) I "cope" by staying involved with her (the baby) to a certain extent. I buy her clothes and when she comes to stay with us I treat her like she is my own. My boyfriend understands my need to be included in that part of his life. We are still working on him communicating with me about what is going on with the baby, you know like any info he gets from the mother, and on me not harping on things he tells me.