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    hey now...I didnt mean to SPAM....I was on my cell doing that, it was horrible. Its 9 PM there...(we have the same times) so TEXT ME whenever, u have my number. Yeah, I love talking with mum...I remember when she first called me...she said "ha ha, it worked"...

    I was so excited I didn't know what to say!!!


    ooooo...I WILL forcefeed you! xx
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    Your ex husband forces you? Don't go back, no one should ever have to put up with that.

    Your recent BF is an alcoholic, smokes, porn, strip joints. I don't think you need that either.

    Spend some time getting to know other men - there are some really nice guys out there - men who will treat you well and be good in bed and not come with a host of addictions.
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    GLAD to hear it... It's natural not to, your all worked up.. xx

    Twas really great talking to you daughter(2), lol,
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    young little one.. eat some food - I am "forcing you" from yonder and Ace want's your phone number lol....
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    hi there!

    i hope you are doing better today. i am sorry i couldn't call you my phone died. i am doing ok...
  6. View Conversation
    Was he right for you? You say he has reassured you many times - why did he need to?

    I know you are hurting but please take time to really think. Maybe he really wasn't the one for you and maybe the right person is out there.
  7. View Conversation
    I'm very sorry to hear that.
    FWIW, men can be just as complex and confused as women when it comes to relationships.

    He may love what he wants you to be, not what you are. He may feel he isn't right for you.

    Maybe when he thinks of marrying, children, settling down he is terrified. He doesn't want to get old, or doesn't want the responsibility?

    Maybe he feels that magic spark that draws him to you - but the rational part of his brain says that you are not right for each other.

    Maybe the rational part feels you are right, but he doesn't feel the spark.

    Many years ago my (future wife) broke up with me after being together for 4 years - went and got engaged to someone else. Said she really liked me as a friend, but didn't really love me. After a few months the engagement broke off, she decided he was a slime, and came backto me. (thats another of my thoughts - she likes me, and I treat her well, but she doesn't love me).
    (more next message)
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    What has happened to break your heart (did you post something and I missed it?)?
  9. View Conversation
    love you too..

    You do but crack me up OMG did i write on my own page? WT? Never mind do you also know how many "posts" only not threads i had to delete in the middle of that and eat a steak with dianne sauce mmmm, and reply geez... xxxx
  10. View Conversation
    am but awake you silly white daughter witch... but not for long i work 12 hrs a day god it.... xx
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View caterpillar79's Blog

Recent Entries

Why am I like this?

by caterpillar79 on 09-13-2010 at 10:40 PM
It's been a considerable amount of time since I last posted here. And I feel a little sad that I never followed through some if my self-monitoring logs on the other stuff.

Anyway....

I feel hot and then cold physically - I'm only 31! Am I menopausing already?! It's really weird!

I also feel like I've been so needy lately and very impatient. I couldn't even wait for this episode I'm having now to subside on it's own without broadcasting it to the whole

Read More

Categories
Dear Diary

Day 3 I feel...What do you think?

by caterpillar79 on 04-29-2010 at 03:51 PM
This is another exercise from Rori Raye's book that I am currently doing. Since my issue is not being able to verbally share out how I feel...

I feel….what do you think?

I feel cherished when you listen to me as I share about my emotions
I feel loved every time you touch me whenever, wherever we are
I feel treasured when you call me when we’re not together, to see how I am holding up
I feel sexy when you kiss me and touch my curves so gently and passionately

Read More

Day 2

by caterpillar79 on 04-28-2010 at 04:39 PM
1. I walked with my pregnant GF at the park for about 2 hours last night and we enjoyed it so much. I picked her up, had pizza and shared about our passion in cooking and baking...I will try to make my own 'pan de sal'.


2. I am happy on my own. Never was I at peace than I am this day.


3. I learned about listening LEVEL 1 and 2. And that my goal is to cultivate my skills and bump it up to level 2.


4. I enjoyed playing with my faithful

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Day 1 of being a puppa

by caterpillar79 on 04-27-2010 at 04:11 PM
I am reading this ebook by Rori Raye, Have the Relationship You Want. I will be using this blog to document my progress as I explore the scary part of me in order to completely heal and be able to give my untainted self to my faithful husband, for he deserves it all.

In the book, she discusses about feminine and masculine roles, and which one I choose to be. That being said, I am taking the feminine role. In my fantasy/ ideal world, I want to surrender to romance, allowing my husband

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What I hear when you say "I love you"

by caterpillar79 on 04-22-2010 at 05:30 PM
(Part 1)

I am still mending
I know I said I'm past it
I know I am
And I think I am well.

But as wounds heal,
They leave scars
That summer had left
Scar tissues
Reminders of how great
It has been
And at the same time
How painful it was.

So here I am,
Writing to myself again
Trying to process
Everything
Anything that comes to mind

What do I hear when you tell

Read More

Categories
Songs Of My Heart

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