Isabellacat

Okay I think I've mentioned him already a few times in the Lounge..... I dunno why but as much as I'm trying to move on ,I just can't. As much as I try to appear like I'm thinking positive,deep down I feel like a total wreck to be honest.

I am VERY depressed about how acrimonious things turned out last month. We've also been playing music together for the last 3 years,asides from being in a relationship with him for all of 2006, we have tried maintaining a friendship through music. Somehow even our friendship has completely fallen apart late last month. The main dispute was about money.......he got very offended by something I said. I told him he does'nt know how to treat women right and called him a cheapskate. Despite someone's advice to me that I should'nt say anything but continue to 'use' him to play music with....for some reason I felt that was'nt right so I told him straight up about how I felt. Seems like he got extremely offended by what I said.....deleted me off his Myspace and Facebook . No matter how much I try to call him he never picks up the calls. It was only one time 2 weeks ago I finally got him on the phone and sounded like we were making amends. After that however he keeps denying my friend requests on FB.....does'nt answer his calls anymore. I feel like he totally lied to me by saying he was'nt mad at me anymore and now it seems like he wants nothing to do with me altogether.
This has NEVER happened between us before. We've had little arguments here and there but it always ended in making up. Lately I've been realizing I do have feelings for him and regret what I told him that set him off. Another aspect of this is that the last time we ever practiced music together, he made some heavy sexual advances towards me. That day I was'nt in the mood and turned down his request. For some reason I feel he feels rejected by that and now sees there's not even a chance we can have a band together.
I feel so depressed because of all this. I've tried to call him numerous times but he does'nt pick up. I'm starting to feel I should just give up but a part of me does'nt want to let go. I feel I've become obsessed with wanting him back.
I also figure this may be it....it's completely over. I just feel very disappointed and depressed about the music we made. Like all that work we've done just thrown in the garbage. I also feel very angry towards him......he treated other girls the same before. Just use them for sex and when he lost interest or did'nt get any he'd just burn the bridges completely.
A part of me wants to really move on but I don't know where to begin. I wish I can meet a new boyfriend soon but I feel so devastated about losing him. I got really used to him being around alot.

What should I do?

CHANDLERS WISH

When they are all we know? That is all we can relate to and as a result we miss "that"... until someone else comes into our lives and then we question what the heck we ever saw in them and their selfish ways, etc.

It's that you have no one to compare, that's all babe.

Let it go and get out there.

CW

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Do we not realise that in order to find a soul
It doesn't happen over night
if truth were to be told

Like everything in life that's hard to achieve
you must believe!

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acerousme

Hey Isa.

trust me doll. It gets better!!! Some days are hard, but you need to remember that you are okay, and someone better will walk into your life. Someone who is....double jointed and likes the kitty ears, and can play the banjo.!!! sweet deal, I know.

remember that we are all here for you, and we all LOVE YOU TO PEICES.

Chin up, and shoulders back missy. you can do this! xxxx

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Mes_T

YOU CAN DO IT!!!

Now you have the chance to find someone truly amazing and fantastic and wonderful and eeeeeeee! Look on the bright side!

Isabellacat

Okay.....I was thinking about this alot today and figured I only miss him because he had a cool music studio and he wanted to play with me. I have some feelings but not that strong.

I met him on this music site actually 3 years ago......but I left that place a year ago.His friends are total snobby weirdos; it's a long story with alot of drama. I just don't know how to move on.....sounds easy just to go out and meet someone new, but I'm really shy and I don't know where to start.

Tex

What about Mr. Falafel?

Or maybe just relax for a while. You don't need to go out and look for a new boyfriend just for the sake of having one. See what comes your way instead.