Nervous all the time
Hi, I need some opinions. I always feel nervous unless I'm at home with my family. Over the years, I've learned to deal with it, but I'm so tired of feeling sick to the stomach and incompetent whenever I step out the door! My mom says I should just deal with it, but I know there must be a better way to live! Do you all ever feel this way? How do you handle it?
Sometimes I'll just be walking around normally, feeling fine, and then I'm just overwhelmed with panic and it's awful. I'm at college now and I feel like I should be learning to be independent, but I don't know how to get more confidence. Will I always be this way, or do you think I can change?
Hi brianna, I think you have to work out why you have the fear, of being surrounded by other people.
How are you at college with teachers and other students?
We all have a phobia, of something, some are very simple, others are more complexed.
Starting at a gym may be a good idea, as you see yourself change it will give you confidence...
But have a think back and see if something comes to mind.
CW
Do we not realise that in order to find a soul
It doesn't happen over night
if truth were to be told.
Like everything in life that's hard to achieve
you must believe!
Thanks for the quick response, CW!
I've always been shy, but I had a horrible time in high school and I especially don't feel confident around other people my own age. I guess it's because I start comparing myself to them and worrying that I'm not as good as they are.
The reason this all bothers me so much, though, is that I don't know why I'm nervous all the time. I have a supportive family, and I've always done well. I just sometimes feel like I'm play-acting all day long and I want to just let my guard down and be myself, but I can't unless I overcome this.
I've talked to my sisters about all this and they don't seem to have the same problem, so I don't think it just runs in my family. Is something wrong with me? Or do I simply need to figure out how to look at the world differently and get more confident?
Anxiety can lead you behind closed doors, so don't ignore that and if you can't jump the hurdle, don't be afraid to seek a Doctor's opinion and advice.
Your Grandmother's or theirs may have suffered from something like this, things can skip an immediate family.
But, it's more than likely to be your confidence, hense why I suggested a gym..
People can be quiet at school/college but you need social skills which you will gain once you gain employment and probably open up a lot more as well.
So seek a hobby that you meet with other people with the exact same interest, so you have something to talk about and can talk about, which will help you with confidence to start with would be my suggestion.
Also hang about, as there will be alot more replies, it's the weekend, so not as many people on here.
CW
Do we not realise that in order to find a soul
It doesn't happen over night
if truth were to be told.
Like everything in life that's hard to achieve
you must believe!
Hi Brianna
Mant people are more nervous than they appear. I stilll feel aquart at my Mums 60th birthday party this weekend and there are many people I know there (just know not my friends). For a job I have to talk to many people face to face and get them to buy in to my way of thinking. I think certain situations make one feel more awckward thant others.
I can empathise with your situation. I am sure yuo're not theonly one feeling like this. Try and make a small but close circle of friends, concentrate on the trust element of your friendship not being cool or smart or what ever. People you trust will be your friends forever.
CW's right about a gym not to look fitter but it real enhances your mood. It's a physical endorfin thing. I don't like the gym 'cos of all the people so I go when I know it will be quite.
CW is right a hobby is a good idea. I know it is a big step meeting new people and stuff. Somtimes you just have to make yourself if you take a friend or sister it will be less difficult and you will be able to build frienships off the back of them.
Try just to push your confidence zone just a little the more you do these things the better you can deal with them mentally. Some of it you wil eventually enjoy but some you will learn to just tolerate
Out of interest ever notice in a bar, restuarant and canteen the same seats are taken up roughly in the same way each time generally back to wall, protecting themselves, you're not alone
If you are interested in a little psychology. Looking into NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming) it king of helps you frame things in you life. I have a CD and a book the CD isn't as good as the book but I am quite lazy so it is useful
Smile, head up and believe in yourself. The only bench mark is your are you a better person today then yesterday?
You are a happy intelliengent indipendant woman, it will all fall into place
Fb
Maybe you have some kind of social anxiety? I'd go to your docs to see if they can help you
Personally?
I'd try all other methods before medication unless you can not function at all...
Our minds are extremely powerful and will take "change" but slowly. As, you slowly change your thought pattern on things by doing things that may assist that, your brain accepts that change.
CW
Do we not realise that in order to find a soul
It doesn't happen over night
if truth were to be told.
Like everything in life that's hard to achieve
you must believe!
Posting Permissions
LinkBack URL
About LinkBacks
Reply With Quote
Bookmarks