Help! My Husband is Depressed
I am new to the world of Depression. My Husband of only 7 months has hit rock bottom. Any suggestions oh how to deal with this or how to try and help him? He is convincing himself that we shouldn't be married anymore
It's hard to say what you can do. Why is he depressed? Is he working? Is he getting close to 40 something? Is he disabled? Is he having trouble with making love? Is he over-weight? You need a place to start with "helping" him with his depression. BUT he has to make the changes himself. You can only let him know you are right beside him. Let me know what he seems depressed for and maybe all the ladies out there can help with some suggestions! Keep your chin up!
He just went back to work and he has gained over 50 pounds in the past 6 months. He works out, but lifting weights. So he is muscular, but he also has a belly. I could care less about that. He is very attracted to me but he has not been nearly as interested unless I initate sex. He is only 27. He is just always in the dumps and is always talking about how he hates his life. He is just sad. Not sure why?
Hey,
Has he gotten help for it? If he has then all you can do is support him and be there for him. If he hasn't then I would recomend getting him help. Though exercise is supposed to help with depression. Just don't let him push himself to much... O.O 50 pounds is alot. I'd also take him to your family doctor, just to make sure his heart is okay, gaining weight that quickly can be bad for it (which is why I'm going to the doctors to, I've gained at least 20 pounds this year.) Also look and see whetjer his ork covers counseling or not, it might help.
My ex- husband, ( no punt intended) had an injury 9 months into our relationship and we were engaged. We married 18 months later, and yes he was depressed.Originally Posted by Smiley00
I am new to the world of Depression. My Husband of only 7 months has hit rock bottom. Any suggestions oh how to deal with this or how to try and help him? He is convincing himself that we shouldn't be married anymore
I couldn't budge it you can't budge it, it is something he needs to do for himself. And, it appears that no one is helping him, qualified that is, he needs to seek and find answers.
All you can do is try to encourage him to remember all the wonderful memories, not just with you, just memories, and then try sutely to encourage him to even check web sites, if he won't see anyone......
But if it remains, it may remain and then you have to deside as it's your life to.
Advise please
Hi everyone,
my husband has bipolar/depression and he blames me and our marriage for his condition. he believes if he leaves the marriage he will be ok! but the problem is i am 6 months pregnant. we have been married for 4 years and he has been this way since i can remember.
it is causing me alot of stress and pain, i am not even enjoying my pregnancy much.
any suggestions?
Hi looking4hope, congratulations on your pregnancy.
You know, my honest thought here is take care of you and your baby, there is only a few weeks to go and you need all the strength you have to look after you and that baby.
It's a strength you are going to have to find within and with knowledge that you can work through the rest after you deliver your beautiful child. It's more important that you eat properly and not be depressed yourself at the moment.
Bipolar, manic depression is an illness, it is not something that has happened because you got married, as you say, he has been that way since you can't recall... If he is not on medication you can suggest that he seeks help in that direction to help him.
If he is saying that it's not to hurt you, this illness is an illness.
If you don't understand it all, then read up on it more, my ex-husband's ex girlfriend, was bipolar and manic depressed and she left her child with him most of the time, so there are things you may need to learn as well to understand that illness better..
But at the moment, try not to stress to much about it this little life you have inside needs you more at the moment.
Take care,
CW
A person with bipolar has to blame this on someone else...He cannot accept the fact that he is to blame...In his mind he may know this but not for long...He immediately returns to the perfect soul...So you will always be blamed...These people sometime change from hour to hour ...They may tell you that they want to go somewhere and three hours later be mad at you...It is just the way that their world goes...Learning to accept this is hard for you must try to anticipate what they are thinking and be ready for any hurt that may arise...They can't help themselves...Try and get him to a doctor for some medication.
Now for you, take care of yourself...Don't stress yourself and take care of that baby....I wish I could say that this will get better but it may not.. Medication will help but you just may find that you are living with a Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....Much luck and love to you...Caroline
Hope - Depressed husband
I know the feeling of disppair. My husband of only 10 months has been deppressed since I've known him. It is very difficult to tell yourself that it's not you, it's him. I had been depressed before in my childhood as a teenager but i overcame it and as an adult i had not experienced depression. You have to know that the only thing you can do is be there for him. He has to seek help and want to change. Feelings come from thoughts and if his thoughts are perpetuated in negativity he will never be happy. My husband struggles with depression and obsessive compulsive desorder. I try to help but in the end I know he needs to make a decision and works toward helping himself. The first few months of our marriage I started feeling Blue myself and feeling less sexy and attractive because he wouldn't initiate intimacy ever even on our honeymoon he was depressed. But little by little those incidents of depression times have gotten shorter and less. I realized i had to give him time and space during the day and just be the caring loving wife I wanted to be.
If your husband is depressed there are two main things you have to remember, you have to be patient and you have to continue to love YOU knowing that any rejection or detachment is not because of who you are.
I wish you all the best!
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