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It sounds like you both need to learn better ways of communicating. Confrontation isn't really much more productive than his angry silence.
How to get someone to open up when their closed tighter than pandoras box?
Hey there, So maybe youve read some of my earlier posts, maybe not, but ill give you the run down.
My boyfriend and I were having problems in the relationship (Well I saw the problems and he thought everything was peachy keen) So I finally layed it down on him. He says he had no idea that I felt the way I did. So anyways, We are working on our problems (Im not perfect eithor) One of his problems is anger.
He wont open up for me. When he gets mad, he wont tell me why he gets mad. He just goes silent. I tell him to tell me, but he eithor says "You should know why" or wont say anything at all. I tell him I cant read his mind, but he just wont do anything.
Also in our talk we had he says he gets mad a stupid things and hes not sure why (Kind of like my friends hubby, if youve read my other post) Its not just me eithor, its stupid drivers on the road, having to wait for his mail (We are having a postal stike right now) But he wont tell me why he gets like this.
We are both very stubborn. I need confrantation, he avoids it.
Does anyone know how to get him to open up, let it all out, or even let a drisle out?
It sounds like you both need to learn better ways of communicating. Confrontation isn't really much more productive than his angry silence.
We can only learn to love by loving. - Iris Mudoch, British writer
How can we do this?
Counseling would be the most effective way. If you don't have access to that there are a number of books on the subject. Why not start at the library?
We can only learn to love by loving. - Iris Mudoch, British writer
Good point. I dont have access to councling right now (mostly a money issue) but I will definatly check the library. Any suggestions on the topics I should search for. Anger issues..or something else?
Communication
Relationships
We can only learn to love by loving. - Iris Mudoch, British writer
Okay, thanks Ill do that
Aside from his anger issues, tell us about your relationship.
Is he angry every day or most often?
Does he show you loving affection?
Does he express any feelings toward you other than anger?
Do you feel loved by him?
Do you feel respected and cherished by him?
Do you feel sexually satisfied in the relationship?
"Be what you're looking for."
"The next time you're thinking of kicking someone when they're down, offer them your hand and help them back up instead."
He gets angry most often (Latley its usally at anything, but not really at me)
Hes starting to show me loving affection. (after our talk) He kises me now, he compements me, when I dont have anymoney but need something (like dish gloves lol) get it for me.
He shows a little love, we joke around, he was happy yesterday. He does express other feelings than anger
I didnt for a while, but after our talk, im slowly starting too.
I still dont feel aas respected as I should, but im seeing a change, its slowly but its there.
Our sex could be better. I dont really enjoy it. And when I do start to enjoy it he finishes too quickly lol so he leaves me hanging lol
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