Thread: Why am i doing this...

The common misconception that cutters have is "I can dull that pain, with THIS pain". In other words, they try to distract themselves from other pains, by inflicting pain upon themselves. But think for a minute.......what ELSE can do you to distract yourself from your stressors? Write your heart out. Draw. Paint....take your paint and sling it around on a canvas until you feel better...the result is a beautiful painting FULL of emotion. Run, run until your legs can't run anymore. Volunteer at a non-profit like the Boys and Girls club. Participate in fundraising for Diabetes Awareness, I'm sure there are groups in your area. Find an outlet that is productive.

It is never easy to watch someone you love suffer. It will never be easy. Your dad is going blind and that is reality. You cutting won't change it. What you are doing is not an outlet....it's something that will leave you scars to forever haunt you of the feelings you are currently feeling. Is that what you want? I expect not....I expect you want to get past what you're feeling, to overcome it, to see happier days. Do you want to live with the constant reminder every time you look down at your arms or legs? Now is the time in your life to learn to accept reality for what it is, and deal with it in the most productive way you can. Your dad is going to be blind..........but he is going to be alive. Blind people function quite normally all over the world. And every day there are new medical developments to help people gain their sight back. We grow up thinking in a way that our parents are immortal, but reality is that they aren't. It's important to cherish and make the absolute best of the time you have with the people you love. My advice to you is to live your life in such a way that you can look back with no regrets. Will you one day regret cutting yourself to pieces instead of laughing, loving, cherishing time with your father? Yes, you absolutely will.

Your mom may be a rotten person. I don't know her well enough to say that. But what I do know is that you are ALL probably stressed right now, worried, scared, upset and are taking it out on each other. You, if you're a highly emotional person, are the easiest one to fight with because you will give her the response and distraction she's seeking. It's wrong...but doesn't make it any less likely. My mom and I fought ALOT when I was your age. I truly felt like I walked in my brothers shadows my whole life. Mom knew EXACTLY how to push my buttons and I knew exactly how to push hers. So when we were stressed about other things....we took it out on each other. Now, my mom is my absolute best friend in the world.

Don't go get yourself put on any meds....go get yourself some counseling, a therapist, someone you can let all this out to. This is a crucial point in your life in which you learn how you will handle things in your life. Do you lay down and wallow...........or do you stand up, brush yourself off and make the best out of your situation KNOWING that it WILL get better?

Find an outlet. A REAL outlet like I mentioned above. Find several outlets if that's what you need. We are always here to listen.

Her mother has had several cancer scares over the past few years, and Gigi has some health issues of her own, so I think all those things and her father's diabetes combine to add a huge amount of stress to the family atmosphere.