Thread: Freezing up when you want to say no. Anybody else experience this?

Have you come across the book, 'Introvert Power' by Laurie Helgoe, PhD? She brought up a lot of things about people who are so much in their heads (like you and I) during conversations, that we need so much time to think of the words to utter. We get drowned by the the noise that the other person we're talking to makes, and while we are processing it to make a comment (or to assert ourselves), this person doesn't recognize we need silence so instead, he/she keep rattling away.

I read the book and now re-reading it but it is still a challenge to use what I learned so that I can come ahead and act "normal" like the others who can assert themselves in challenging situations. That's my battle even at work. When one of the kids in my class yells at me, I freeze!

I do think healthy and respectful people will respect your boundary, and will not insist on getting what they want. Obviously, I was around unhealthy people that I got rid of.

In terms of being assertive, there are cases where I think walking away is the best option like with a stranger or someone who just doesn't matter.

On dates, I've learned my lesson and know how to carry myself strong enough to gt the person to back off.