Please Read and Help if Possible.

**Lovelovelove92** · 12-24-2011 02:50 PM

If you can read my ABOUT ME before you read this.

I feel like a walking contradiction, I've wanted to be a mother for as long as I've understood the concept yet I've had two abortions.

I won't lie to people I just can't I don't see the point, yet I lie to myself ALL THE TIME.

I know I love my boyfriend and I know he loves me. I am happy living with him and just being around him yet every other day I wonder if he'd be better off without me.

Because of these feelings I'm questioning my point of existence. HELP.

**jns** · 12-24-2011 03:36 PM

In a way, the government should give access to free psychological counseling to those who have abortions. Many women are fine with having one, but others have deep-seated problems that should not be ignored or covered over. I hope you can find peace somewhere.

If your bf wants to help you, he can help you by building you up every day with positive affirmations. Since he loves you, he should say it fairly often. Even though you know he loves you, the process of you hearing it from him in a timely manner will gradually get you to believe it completely. If he loves you, he would definitely not be better off without you. He should also compliment you on everything that is you, both the good and what you think is bad (but probably really isn't).

Another point of your existence is that you love him. Take your time and show him that you love him every day in many small ways. You don't have to spend money to do this. You don't even have to spend a lot of time. But you do have to think and be clever a little bit.

Keep a diary of what you do every day. It will help you organize your mind. With your mind better organized, you will be less prone to depression.