Thread: help me

Over time, we develop a habitual pattern of reaction to our emotions. So you have developed this pattern of blowing up when you are angry and having a chemical imbalance makes it worse. The key to anger management is finding ways to channel your anger and also new ways to react to anger.

I think the first step to relieving and preventing intense anger (along with other emotional problems such as depression) is to become a more healthy and active person. People who stay inside their house all the time and constantly do the same things will build up a lot of energy and irritabillity. Your body and mind need stimulation and change.

My suggestion to you (if you are not already doing this) is to exercise by walking around the neighborhood, bicycling, rollerblading, etc. Exercise is crutial for expelling excess energy (the same energy that makes you angry). It's best to do these things in the morning before you begin your day!

Going to parks, fishing, or just doing anything that will get you outdoors is good. Sunlight has been proven to brighten moods and is also an important part of your health.

Try taking up some relaxation techniques like meditation or Yoga. I personally just go to the park and sit quietly some times. The key there is to not think about the stresses in your life. These things can help you learn to calm yourself in stressful situations.

The way you view things is important. If you have an overall bad attitude about life and certain situations, you need to consciously make an effort to do the opposite. When you find yourself getting down in the dumps, find something positive to think about or at least something to take your mind off it. People who suffer from depression find it very hard to do these things because they just can't seem to find any good in the world and they want to dwell on the bad. You just have to open your mind to positive thoughts.

I have found that my life is much less stressful once I accepted the fact that things are bound to go wrong and life is full of dissappointments, but the key is to not dwell on it for a long time and just accept it and move on. For example:

Your car breaks down and you are late for work. You are mad at this point. Your boss yells at you and tells you next time you will be fired. Now you are reeeeally angry and you have to sit through this job you hate for 8 hours. That makes you even more irritated.

So, do you sit and think about all of those things all day and all night long? Constantly feeding your anger? Making you have a bad attitude towards everyone? NO!! You need to just say "That's life. It happens. Now I just have to deal with it." But don't be mad about it forever. Let the anger go. Tell yourself that it won't do you or anyone else any good to be mad about it. It won't change anything. It might sound silly, but if you can start thinking that way, it will really help.

When someone is in your face, making you angry and you feel like you are on the verge of losing it, tell them you don't want to talk about it right then and that you need some time to think. There is no shame in that and it will give you time to cool down and sort out your feelings. In times when that is not possible, it is important to have that positive outlook that I mentioned. Just brush off the anger and replace it with positive thoughts of "how can I resolve this situation calmly?"

Of course there are eating habits to consider. Certain things can fuel the fire. Stay away from anything with caffiene in it. No power drinks or anything like that. Those things are meant to give you more energy, thus making you excited and irritable.

I suffer from social anxiety and at one point was having panic attacks. I started to avoid people. I was also very irritable. It took a long time, but I am much better now because I have this new way of thinking. Believe me when I say this stuff works! Good luck to you and let us know how things go for you!