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Thread: My daughter wants a cell phone?!!

  1. #1
    imported_alibaby
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    Question My daughter wants a cell phone?!!

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    My daughter is almost 12 years old and just started middle school. She goes on and on each day about getting a cell phone; how her friends all have phones; what she will do with a cell phone; etc. I know it's popular these days, but I have my reservations. I keep thinking about when I was a kid (a few decades ago) and how I managed ok without one. Why can't she?!! Any one have any opinions or suggestions to share about this?
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  2. #2
    imported_Nomi01
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    I'm only 19, but maybe you still want to hear my opinion..

    I remember wanting a cell phone very badly when I was 12 as well, mostly because all of my friends had them, and I always saw them getting messages and I wanted that too.
    My parents never got me one, because they said I could always find a public phone if I wanted to, and they didn't want to spend the money, and even if I payed for it, they didn't think i was old enough for the responsibility and they were afraid I'd get into debt, and all that stuff.

    Of course I was furious, but after a while it stopped mattering to me so much, until I turned 17 and suddenly my parents urged me to get one, so I could call them in case I was out late and/or something happened!
    Now the thing was *I* didn't want it any more, because I thought it was too expensive, and I didnt like phone calls anyway, and I knew that if you had a cellphone, people would never be on time, because they could always call you and tell you they'd be late.

    after a while I gave in though and got a used one from a friend, which I still own, but never use. I hardly ever turn it on, even though I sometimes carry it with me when I go out. just in case.

    So to make a long story short... I really don't think it would do your daughter any harm if you don't get her one, because even though she says all her friends have them (is that true? that's a lot for twelve year olds...), I'm sure they're not picking on her for it or anything.
    It will just be something she can't get right away, something everyone has to go through all of their lives, and.. doesn't that build character? hehe no seriously, kudos to all the parents who can stand a little whining, and not have their kids turn out to be spoiled brats who always expect to get what they want.
    She's really old enough to get over this, it won't cause any serious damage =)

    the only reason why I'd give my child a cell phone would really be for when they leave for a few days or something, for emergencies. I live in germany and we use a lot of public transportation, and if you miss the last metro at midnight or something, you can call someone to pick you up.

    so.. if you want to keep that option open, but still don't want to give her her own phone, have you ever thought about getting a family cell phone?
    It would be there for "special occasions", and you could keep track of how much she's using it.

    whatever you do, I hope it works out well for the both of you...

    and by the way, I heard all the celebrities are getting rid of their cell phones, because nowadays that everybody has one, it has become a luxury to be unreachable
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  3. #3
    imported_karen
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    It's not a bad idea for her to get one. Although you might want to wait a little bit before you do give it to her. Otherwise she is going to think that anything she asks for she will get it right away. Get her a used one. Just let her know that if she over uses it or goes crazy on ringtones or anything expensive for the phone you will take it away. Never in a million years would my mom give me one when I was her age. My mom didn't even let me get my class ring or yearbook :-(. Anyways, it could come in handy in case of an emergency. Best of luck.
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  4. #4
    imported_tforme
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    Default I have 2 daughters with cell phones

    I have two daughters that have cell phones and at thier ages 14 and 12, I am happy they have them. My oldest is in highschool and my younger is in middleschool and it has saved all of us a lot of time and i can call them at any time and leave a message or they can call me if something is wrong. or even if they need to stay after school and so on. it has been great.
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  5. #5
    imported_alibaby
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    Thanks to all for the responses. Sounds like a good idea on paper, but in reality, I think she would be playing games and playing with the features more than actually calling anyone for anything important. I notice that many of the kids at her school have them and it looks "cool" to have a cellphone. She's already trying to be "Miss Popular" and I think the phone would just get her closer to that image. I've never been one to follow the crowds when it comes to my children and the things they want. I guess she will have to wait because the jury's gonna be out for a while.
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  6. #6
    Junior Member spo4 is on a distinguished road
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    i am a sole parent of 4 sons..(spo4).. my 3 oldest children have mobile phone, they are 14.. 13.. and 10.. and it makes my life so much easier. i can text them if im going to be late from work, and they can pick up the younger boy from school and wait till i get there.. and like others have said in response, its also fantastic if kids are ever in any kind of trouble and need to make an emergency call. another bonus is:when the kids havent dont the right thing.. taking their phone away turns into a great punishment, and when they have done the right thing.. they receive extra credit. you can make the rules and turn it into a positive experience, as long as you teach your child the dangers associated with having things written in text messages that might come back and bite them one day, aswell as what imported_Nomi01
    said about ring tones and other subscription scams. myparents tell me all the time that my kids dont need phones.. coz after all we never had them etc.. but then.. they never had tv, microwaves, computers,either.. and they wouldnt part with it now
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    WH Super Moderator patricias213 is on a distinguished road patricias213's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by imported_alibaby View Post
    Thanks to all for the responses. Sounds like a good idea on paper, but in reality, I think she would be playing games and playing with the features more than actually calling anyone for anything important. I notice that many of the kids at her school have them and it looks "cool" to have a cellphone. She's already trying to be "Miss Popular" and I think the phone would just get her closer to that image. I've never been one to follow the crowds when it comes to my children and the things they want. I guess she will have to wait because the jury's gonna be out for a while.
    If you as her parent thinks that she will be using the cell phone to play games, playing with the features and to look cool then its probably not a good idea to get her one right now. Theres lots of pay phones around and you certainly want her to know and understand when you do decide to get her a phone is to be able to have contact with her , just in case emergency or something like that, not so she can look "cool".
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  8. #8
    Junior Member reesecup is on a distinguished road reesecup's Avatar
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    My daughter is 13 and wants a cell phone as well. I finally broke down and got her one (but I haven't given it to her because she received a D on her report card)......

    But the one reason why I got this phone is because it has chaperone capable. I can set up boundaries on her phone and whenever she gets out of the vicinity, it sends a text alert to my cell phone. From the web or from my phone, it will give me a map of where she is (address and is pretty accurate). I am a Verizon customer, but I believe most cell companies now have this option. I believe with everything that is going on, kidnappings, and teenagers being hot, I now have a little parental control. And even if she turns off the phone, the GPS is still on.

    As far as games is concerned, you can always get the phone and eliminate the ability for her to "get it now" (which includes games and downloads), get a phone with no camera (so she won't be taking or receiving any lewd pictures). But you know your child. While there may always be a payphone around, she may not always be able to get to that phone. A lot of times, time is of the essence.
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    July 2007 "Poster of the Month" louieann34 is on a distinguished road louieann34's Avatar
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    It is not a bad idea to let her have a cellphone, for she can use this in case of some emergencies in these kind of days right now.

    But before giving it to her, you should tell her that for her to have a cellphone she should have to earn it...And that when she has one, you should also inform her that she should use it in a proper way.

    Take Care and God Bless You and your Family.
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  10. #10
    Ivy
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    Default It's Okay

    My son is 12 and he has wanted one for a while. I decided to get him a cell phone as a reward. Reward for doing well in school and with other activites ad chores he has to take care of. I explained to him why I rewarded him with the phone and let him know that its was up to him how long he could keep this luxzury. You know, depending on him keeping up and handling things very well. I am a strong beliver in rewarding the kids for doing well and staying on track.
    So far I have not benn disapointed very proud of him actually.
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