Thread: Mother of sexual teen

Personally, I plan on being very open about sex with my kids. You situation is just another reason why. If she thinks you disapprove of what she's doing, she'll lie to you about it. Duh. Grounding her, yelling at her... Ask yourself what you are really trying to accomplish, because it's not going to stop her sex life.

Originally Posted by caligirl71

this past year I have gotten into reading her texts and emails etc..

I think that is totally out of order, how would you like it if someone was doing that to you?

Your daughter is almost 18 so is old enough to make her own mind up about things she isnt breaking the law or anything and if she chooses to have sex with her bf thats up to her and nothing to do with you

You should be grateful she is planning on using condoms with bf alot of girls dont these days all you are doing is pushing your daughter away from you, think you need to back off and let her lead her own life before she decides she doesnt want you in her's

Words from an 18 year-old: I highly doubt your daughter likes this pressure you're putting on her and the amount of space you've allotted her. You have to trust her soon.

I'm sure you were praying for the child that didn't have sex until they were older. Heck, my mother has that child and she still doesn't believe I'm not having sex. Just let your daughter be herself and let her learn from her own mistakes.

Speaking as someone of a similar age (and to an extent, similar situation), teens having sex can't really be stopped. There is always a way they'll find to do it even if you forbid them, they'll manage it.

Over here our age of consent is 16, and my mum wasn't happy when I started having sex with my boyfriend then, we'd been together for a few months and I'm still not sure how she found out. But eventually she realised that once I was out of the house she really couldn't stop me oing anything.

I'd say really to just encourage her to be careful and maybe recommend the pill. I got myself onto that and we were buying condoms and so on, but sometimes that doesn't always happen, so it's worth a mention.

okay, I am 15 and I have had sex twice and it's like my sex drive is crazy. Especially when my boyfriend tells me how much he enjoyed it and how good it felt in my.. ya, I guess it boosts my confidence because I've never been the VERY outgoing type.
My boyfriend just turned 19 and my mom doesn't like him because of that, but she knows that if she says that I can't see him, that I will find a way to see him. It's like if she doesn't let me live my life and she literally tries to stop me from doing what I do then it just puts a lot between us.
I stay up till 2 or so at night and wake up at 6. I have 2 advanced classes 3 college classes and one regular class. All of which, I am making no lower than an 85 in.
I love to "play around" but that's the farthest we usually go. We have condoms, and the only reason we have them is just in case. Ya know?
We have them as the "oh god we've gone too far safety."
I can't ask my mom to put me on birth control because she'd flip.

So honestly.
all I suggest is you should respect her, give her the right protection, make sure she's informed and I would let her make her own decisions.

I mean that's just coming from me. Knowing how I am, I would realllyyy respect my mom if she would just give me my room for mistakes as she had mistakes too. Get what im saying?

Originally Posted by SinisterUrge

PS: Talk to your children about safe anal sex. A good idea to mention it when you give them the masturbation talk at 12 since self-anal penetration is incredibly common among both genders of all orientations..... and the source of many late-night trips to the emergency room

"I swear to God I was mopping the floor naked and fell onto that carrot!"

My sister-in-law is a radiologist and they keep a file of X-rays just for stuck improvised sex toys.... seriously, this is a day-to-day occurence at almost every hospital.

*Latex gloves. Fingernails are sharp, rectal walls are thin and sensitive.

*Lube. Forcing fingers/toys in there is going to cause rectal bleeding (and nobody wants to drive their child to the hospital for that one either).

*Use a proper anal sex toy! (see the aforementioned carrot reference). The sphinter muscles of the anus like to snap shut. Proper anal sex toys have wide flared bases to keep things from getting stuck all the way in.

Anal sex is a very uncomfortable dialogue to have with your children naturally. So just keep it short and sweet. If your child has a history of sticking things up their butt (or all the hair brushes disappear mysteriously only to reappear with an odd aroma), its probably best to buy a box of latex gloves, a bottle of lube, and a cheap anal probe at the toy store and leave them in their room in a brown paper bag. hopefully your kids will get the idea and you won't even need to speak to them about it ever again.

I do nottttttt suggest this. If your daughter is a senior in high school, SHE KNOWS ABOUT ANAL.

let her make her own decision.

I do agree with several of the posts here. As hard as it is, you may have to let go a little bit. When I was that age my mom was super snoopy when it came to e-mails, IMs, where I was at, etc. It got to a crazy point where she actually checked my mileage to make sure I was going where I was supposed to be.

Honestly, the probing and snooping made it 10 times harder to trust my mom . . . especially when she talked to me about sex or anything that was going on in my life. Please give your child some space. It's going to be really hard because you've always been there to protect her, but eventually those mistakes will have to be learned the hard way.

I think I honestly would have stopped seeing the guy I was seeing when growing up if my mom would have let me figure out he was bad news in the first place.

I don't suggest, however, completely letting her go crazy with her own decisions. Do not keep her from him. But I think enforcing a curfew if she's still under your roof would be good . . . especially if you know that she would be done with work.

Informing her about safe sex would also be good. Note: informing, not forcing.

Not sure if you're still in this situation, since this is an old post, but I hope everything works out for you.

LEaveeee her alone just be a friend not a mother.. this is why Im 18 and living in with a bf .. You mothers are so noisyyy