advice on teenage boys 10 and 14
Hi
I have two boys and recently everything just is fallin out of place. they are 10 and 14. 10 yr are swearing at school and gets angry a lott and he can't control his anger. he has a habbit to lie. it seems thaat i can't get them to talk to me and open up to me. we are very strict and my husband are the one that gets very angry when they do things wrong. my eldest had a bad report and we had to find out parents meeting that he didn't hand in all his hoemwork and it counts as term mark. he also lies and for everythinbg they don't do the excuse and answer is always i don't know. i get anchious and very sad when my husband said things like if he did not do it why would a 14 year do it now. i studied way before tests are mentioned and were always on tract with my school work. i told him that my boys are individuals on their own. i am afraid that he will break their spirit. we are born again christians and we are well off and can provide them with anything they ask. they are in private schools.
Personally, I'd be more concerned about your 10 y/o right now. My son and my step son both went through what your 14 y/o is doing. If there's consequences to his actions, then he'll start to realize that if isn't doing what's expected of him in school then he shouldn't expect the rewards of doing things he likes. I've found through my own experiences that it's part of him finding his own identity.
You're 10 y/o may be a different story though. The swearing is just seeing how far he can push someone's buttons. He's testing your meddle. The anger though may be a sign of something completely different. I'd suggest a complete physical with blood work to make sure there's no underlying cause. After that, talk to his teachers and counselors to make sure there isn't something going on at school that he's having a tough time dealing with whether it be bullying or feeling left out.
My experience, they'll get through it.
There will always be boundries, but making love is so different, than having sex, let's face it. CW
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