It sounds like he is immature. Both parents should work at getting children to sleep the right amount and at proper times.
My husband and I have a 2 1/2 year old son, and he is our first and only child for now. My husband works nights and then either goes to work at our business or comes home and spends some time with our son before going to bed around 1pm.
Our son goes to bed anywhere between 8:30 - 10:30 depending on what time I'm able to finish up our business. His routine is change his diaper and jammies and rock in our recliner while I catch up on my shows. 8 times out of 10 my son hates to go to bed and tries to find any excuse to delay. Of course this is when my husband gets up and starts getting ready for work. My son will be laying there in my arms quietly (FINALLY) and my husband will come over and kneel beside him and start kissing him, and coddling him and helping my son plead with me to give in to his requests ie another story, drink, snack ect... Then my husband walks off and my son starts crying and throwing a fit and we have to start all over!
I love that my husband is a good father that loves his son but this is really annoying! Would this irritate you? For me, not only is is delaying my me time or my sleep time but it makes me feel like the bad guy all the time!
It sounds like he is immature. Both parents should work at getting children to sleep the right amount and at proper times.
Parenting is a partnership and both parents are supposed to present a united front to the kids, even if they disagree about something. The have that discussion away from the kids. If he cannot support something as simple as a bedtime routine, what will happen on bigger issues? It sounds like he thinks it is cute now to play "gang up" on Mom, but eventually it could backfire and you lose credibility with your son because he learns how to pin the two of you against each other.
Routine, routine, routine....at your son's age that's what should be going on in his life. Find a time that works for you and him and put him to bed every night at the same time. Perhaps BEFORE your husband gets up to start his day. Your husband can still go in your son's room and kiss him good night, wish him well, say a prayer or whatever, without causing more work for you.
As for your son hating to go to bed, that may be because he has no routine (scheduled time) or because his father is encouraging him not to.
There is a GREAT book and CD/video available that changed our family's lives forever. Do a search for "books" as I believe I've posted it there. If not, it's by Dr. Thomas Phelan Ph.D. You could do a G***le search for him too. 1-2-3.....
Your son's age is a perfect time to start with the advice given in the book and on the CD/video. Read the book, ask your husband to read it, at least watch the video together and do what it instructs you to do. Amazing!
It worked for this divorced father of a son and daughter, it can certainly work for you.
Good luck.
Would it tick me off yes! BUT the issue here is in you control. As others said routine, routine, routine and do it before your husband get's up, problem solved. He can still go in and say bye before he leaves and you won't be the bad guy.
Good Luck.
Cashybum, I hear you! My wife and I have a 20 month old daughter, and there are tedious nights when we work hard to get her to sleep. Let your hubby know that's it's a challenge to get your son to sleep and he's got to play his parenting part by at least staying away from him so you can get him to sleep. Yes, this would tick me off too!
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