Fighting at school

**Crystalblue** · 05-27-2011 04:13 PM

I was thinking about the same thing. We get regular fliers for kid's karate lessons. I think I'll do that. It would help him mentally & physically. Plus, it would be comforting to me, knowing that he can handle himself.

The schools spend a lot of time worrying about adults abusing the students, which does need attention, but I don't think there's a whole lot they can do about violent kids. That's a parenting situation. I wish I could just shake some since into that kid's parents.

**CHANDLERS WISH** · 05-27-2011 04:37 PM

By all means, do

Just kidding.

For him to go to strangle, that's alot of resentment in being told what to do, I imagine him to be bullied at home, physcially hit even by maybe his Father, perhaps a reaction not really to your son but something more....

If he thought he was a friend, then don't discount that he may apologise as well.

**Crystalblue** · 05-27-2011 06:56 PM

I was told they did a little mediating afterwards & the boy was sorry, but I don't know what all was said, or what they talked about. "sorry I tried to strangle you", doesn't seem like something I would except. I hope the school takes his actions seriously. If I catch wind about it happening to someone else's kid, you better believe I'll let them know it had happened before & the school could have done something.

**Mes T** · 05-27-2011 07:20 PM

Maybe you and a representative of the school could have a conference with the other boy's parents. To talk about what happened and why, and also to make a point that you're not just going to forget this and brush it off.

I would refrain from keeping your son at home though, for these last couple of days of school! It may make him feel disconnected from his friends during this special end-of-year time... and it may make him feel like HE is the one getting punished for someone else's actions.

And not to make light of the situation, but, boys fight sometimes.

It's not the end of the world, especially if they were/ARE friends. The other boy will likely apologize and things will go back to normal, as if it never happened. Lots of kids are like that.

**Crystalblue** · 05-27-2011 08:58 PM

Yeah Mes T, that's almost exactly what my husband said about it. I don't think I over reacted, it's upsetting to have something like this happen where kids are supposed to be safe, but kids are still learning self control & appropriate behavior at this age, so I'll try not to make it more serious than it is. The school knows I'm upset about it & I let them know I didn't agree that suspension was enough. When I asked about assault charges, she knew this wasn't something I was just gonna brush off.

My husband said not get worked up over it, when he was fine. I don't like the idea of anyone messing with my kids. I immediately go into attack mode. But I'll sign him up for karate and hopefully the school will take action if the other kid does this again.

**Mes T** · 05-28-2011 05:31 AM

Yeah luckily there seems to be a heightened awareness of bullying in schools these days, and I bet it's thanks to parents like you, who don't just sit back and let whatever happen to their kids.

This boy who attacked your son did something wrong, and hopefully this attention will shock him out of any future plans he had of exhibiting bullying behavior.

Still, in many ways this is somewhat of a "normal" thing to happen, a couple of boys having a scruff. It's been addressed now, and I don't think much further action is required (apart from self-defense classes or parent-teacher conferences).

It would be an entirely different matter if the bullying came from an adult. One of my co-worker's daughter got smacked in the head with a clip-board by an authority figure at her school. Unfortunately nothing could be done to reprimand the adult who did it, so the family had to move schools.

If you get into mama-bear mode when your son's classmate attacks him, could you even imagine what it would be like if it were a teacher?? O_O