Thread: Motherly-Figure to Expectant Mother

It's pretty obvious from reading this and other posts, you have a very kind and giving soul and alot of love to hand out to anyone that crosses your path, plus a fiesty little nature Tell it how it is....

Personally? As a friend, I would be there for her to explain to her family, she can't keep it from them, nor conceal it. Also, from the sounds of your introduction and other threads, you have alot of good things happening in your life, alot of "important" things to do with it, you can be there as a friend and should be there as a friend but you can't hide this it will way on you emotionally and morally and you'll have sleepless nights.

As a "giver" myself, it's so hard to draw the line, you so much want to nurture and help and be the one to be there for everyone, but sometimes, we can make wrong management decisions.

I admire you for wanting to be there for her, but like you stated, your not her Mum nor are you ready to be one, this is in my "opinion" too big a responsibility for you.

You can be there for her and offer the advice people here give about how, but I personally think "as it sounds as if she wants to keep the baby" that she needs advice in this regard from a Doctor, the pros and cons, and also you don't mention the Father, his response, responsibilities if she keeps the baby, her real thoughts on how she will cope.

How he feels.. What he has stated over this. That's also important for her to view.

When young and pregnant, you need to know the full facts, the home truths, how it will affect your life, to make management decisions. And, regardless of religion, which off course is scaring her and naturally your trying to "protect her", can create a rift later.

I wonder if you can accompany her to a Doctor's appointment so that at least this can all be layed out to her.

Ultimately thought, how will her Mother feel when she is too far gone and she wasn't there to talk to her about it all?

If you were really her Mother, and someone, a friend, stopped you being a Mother, being there for her, even though she will for sure be upset and maybe try to talk her out of it, but you never had the chance, because you found out at say, 4 months? How would you feel?

It's so hard I know but have a think.

CW