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For many women there really is no emotional fallout. The emotional factors are a matter of perspective, usually based in religion. Why not just play it by ear?
abortion
sorry, im not sure that it belongs here but im not sure which part to put it in so if its wrong im sorry.
okay so my friend had the copper iud and it fell out without her noticing.
anyway because she'd had it so long she wasnt as...up to date on checking the strings as she should have been so now she's pregnant.
she's about ten weeks by all accounts and she has decided to have a termination.
i fully support her in this as i would have done if she had decided to keep it.
my question is
has anyone else been through this?
does anyone have any good ideas as to how to support her?
i know this is the right decision for her but the emotional fallout will almost certainly be awful and i'd be so grateful for any tips anyone has.
thankyou x
'so why care for these petty obsessions? your designer heart still beats with common blood. and what if you could have genetic perfection? would you change who you are if you could?'
For many women there really is no emotional fallout. The emotional factors are a matter of perspective, usually based in religion. Why not just play it by ear?
We can only learn to love by loving. - Iris Mudoch, British writer
It's emotional, but just be there for her. Women deal with it differently. Some are fine with it, some have some issues after. Be there for her and support her. Talk to her.
Knowing she doesn't have to go through it alone will help her more than you would think.
If you feel she's not dealing with it very well, emotionally, talk to her about going to a counselor.
Friendship Prayer
May the fleas of a thousand camels infest the crotch of the person who screws up your day and may their arms be too short to scratch.
Amen
Whoever said anything was possible obviously never tried slamming a revolving door.
she has other issues though which lead me to suspect that it'll be bad for her.Originally Posted by WildChild
i mean its already pretty bad and she hasnt done it yet.
thankyou for your help x
'so why care for these petty obsessions? your designer heart still beats with common blood. and what if you could have genetic perfection? would you change who you are if you could?'
My friend had this done, and thinking that she would get no support from anyone she went alone. I told her, when she called me crying, that I would have went with her, held her hand, and taken care of her. She did this due to drug use. She was afraid the baby would come out all wrong or something. She didn't think it would be so hard on her. I sat in her house and let her vent, let her cry and told her that she would be fine. I told her she did a very parental thing by making that decision and no one was judging her.
I think the best thing to do would be support her, hold her hand give her hugs, and remember that it will be marked in her mind for the rest of her life. It will come up at odd times and all she needs is support that she is making the right choice and the people who care about her, you, don't think she is a awful person for what she choose to do. Remind her that it was her body and her choice. Remind her that for her, if that is what she felt was right, than it was right. If you both are close than in your heart you will know what to do, be tolerant, loving, and remember that just because she says she is fine today a week later she may not be.
Just make sure that she knows you are there and that you support her and you're not judging her. I think that's the biggest issue a lot of times. Some women go into that situation feeling at peace with their decision, but it's the judgement of others that makes them question their own situation.
I have a friend who had an abortion and was absolutely fine, physically and emotionally. So, it really all depends on who you talk to.
thankyou all so much
im going to go with her when she gets it done
im just...worried for her.
she is in no position to have a child at the moment
so i believe this is the right decision for her
but obviously its up to her and i would have supported her whatever
even if it ended up both of us in a council flat with a screaming baby.
i cannot thank you all enough x
'so why care for these petty obsessions? your designer heart still beats with common blood. and what if you could have genetic perfection? would you change who you are if you could?'
You are a good friend and she will appreciate you for it very much.
Good luck to her.
Friendship Prayer
May the fleas of a thousand camels infest the crotch of the person who screws up your day and may their arms be too short to scratch.
Amen
Whoever said anything was possible obviously never tried slamming a revolving door.
You are a great friend to do this. It is important that she has someone in her corner.
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