Thread: When is the right time???

I totally understand where he is coming from but he always sees the positives which I love about him so he doesn't accept that it may take a couple of years of trying anyway! We have just began renting a bigger house and are hoping to buy it in a couple of years so he sees that as a bigger priority which I appreciate, we both share that dream. I want children so much, more than anything in life and if there is a chance that there may be a problem and also I've explained to him that CIN III isn't cancer but needs to be treated and I can't be treated whilst pregnant, it's safer for me healthwise to get pregnant now rather than in 4 or 5 years...My doctor even hinted at us starting after the last colposcopy but that has fallen on deaf ears...I don't want to pressure him and I don't want us to resent each other in the future...I'm so confused

Lanabear is right it is a tough question you are asking. I don't feel there is a true answer to your question. My husband said he never wanted children. After I, while on BC pills, got pregnant he even wanted me to abort. However after almost five years now he is glad that I didn't listen to him. I feel that men rarely know what they really want till it is there in their faces. My husband would say your husband is reacting how any man would. He looks at you and anyone else that comes along as a responsibility that he has to provide for. Even if you are working you are still his responsibility, in his eyes. He loves you and will love anything that is you. You need to let him know that you will accommodate his wishes as well as yours. I would tell him that you want a reasonable compromise, something you both can live with. let him know the risk factors of a woman who is pregnant over 35, and the possibility of getting pregnant after you have gone through what you have gone through. Talk to a doctor about all these things too, men seem more open to suggestions from others and especially health professionals. I hope this helps you.

Well... I can tell you "tricking" him into getting you pregnant is the wrong way to go most definately.

Here's what I would do personally.... The next time you have a doctors appointment have your husband go with you and you and your husband talk to the doctor about the proceedures that you have had done, and what your future holds as far as your chances of conceiving a child if you waited as apposed to trying now. Also make sure that the doctor spells out the risks if any if you were to wait and get pregnant later.... knowledge is power and maybe if your husband heard for himself from the doctor the odds, risks etc.... it might nudge him in the right direction.