Thread: pregnant. ER

How far along are you?

Ill share my story with you, take it or leave it sweet, after ultimately is it your decision....

I became pregnant 2 years ago, so that wouldve made me 21years old...not planned, only found out when i wanted to eat pickles out of the jar in every shop i went into ....anyway, long story short...i had a scan, i was 6 weeks - if i had been over 10 weeks, i wouldve kept the baby... my own decision was that i was going to have a termination, based on (and solely on this reason) that i was under 10 weeks... I didnt take anything else into consideration except for what was going on right there and then.

Ive regretted it ever since.

My mother is a midwife, she supported me fully, (as did my partner), i had a medical termination as the thought of being knocked out scares the monkeys out of me. As soon as i sat on the toilet, having contractions (that lasted a beautiful 5 hours), i only then began to think about what decision to make....

The last 2 years, i havent stopped thinking, "oh, today 'it' wouldve been a year old" - "i wonder what id be doing now if id kept 'it' "

Im not trying to sway you, it does sound like i am though, im just pressing you to really, really think about....i know you are, but you need to think about it in a way that only involves you and your child. Sounds selfish, i know, but you might leave your man, he might leave you....the futures not set in stone...

As for not being in that stable environment....what if you never are? There is never, ever a right time to bring a child into the world, otherwise its too mechanical. Every mother is succesful, no matter what their circumstances are.

I wish you the best of luck in your decision.... be logical, dont let too many emotions get in the way...but then dont do a me and be nothing but logical and cold in your decision making....

I think that ultimately you are going to have to make the decision that is right for you. but I do have to say that if your man loves you and wants to be with you forever, he will love you with or without his baby. I wouldnt let the fear of losing him stop you from having this baby. I was pregnant last year (miscarried) and my boyfriend was going to do the right thing by helping me out, but he wasnt ready to be a dad (nor was I ready to be a mother) but I knew that I would live to regret it if we didnt. for the first 2 months of knowing, my boyfriend seemed to grow distant. Then we had the ultrasound, and he saw that there was a baby inside me and how amazing it was. He knew that we had made the right decision. and he was glad he stuck around. but honestly, if I thought that he would leave me just because I kept the baby, I wouldnt have let it stop me. It would just mean he wasnt meant to be with me forever, whether he left me now or 2 years from now. Let it be your decision.